My Angel
by claryxjace
Summary: Jace is the popular boy in school and can get any girl he desires but one girl is leaving him in questions. Clary Fray. She beautiful, smart and perfect but she is hiding something from him. A disease.Will Jace stick with her when it resurfaces? Or go on?
1. Chapter 1

**I got this idea and wrote it down!! So Here it is! Chapter 1~**

~Jace~

Jace sat outside on the school lawn with his brother Alec, his sister Isabelle, Magnus, Aline,Maia, and Sebastian. Alec and Magnus were cozying up beside each other. Aline as usual was hanging all over Jace. When is this girl going to realize it's over, he thought to himself. Isabelle sat to Jace's right and was chatting with Maia of what she considered 'girl things.'  
"So what did the principal do to you?" Sebastian asked and the group turned their attention. Jace grinned and scanned their faces. Anyone would know Jace was the school prankster. He had recently poured orange mixture in the sprinkler water tube at school and orange went flying in all different directions.  
"He is making me volunteer at a local animal shelter, every day after school."  
"Ew gross." Jace shrugged at Sebastian.  
"Check out Fray." Alec said pointing towards the red head across the lawn.  
"Those clothes are so two seasons ago." Izzy said whipping out her phone. Jace watched the girl carry a box down the walkway towards them. She was beautiful but she wasn't very popular. She always hung around the nerds, especially the anime nerd Simon. Clary was a regular church goer, of course only because her father was the minister. Jace goes to her church every Sunday, but not by choice. His adoptive parents Maryse and Robert make him, Alec, and Izzy go. She walked in front of them now.  
"Nice shoes." Aline said to Clary in a snotty tone.  
"Thanks." Clary said looking down at her old worn converse then walked away. The group started laughing. "Nice one Aline." Sebastian said to her and they did a quick high five.  
"Quit being so mean." Maia stood up for Clary whenever there group made fun of her.  
"She just needs a little less clothes, that are up to date and she would be dead sexy." Jace chuckled at the thought of the preachers daughter in hardly any clothing. The bell rang and they all scattered and went to class.

School was always a complete drag for Jace. He never found any amusement in learning. The teachers all hated him for not living up to 'his potential.' He would simply laugh and make cocky remarks at them when they said this and he would end up going to the office for disrespect.  
___________________________________________________________________

After school Jace hopped in his car with his brother and sister. He drove them home first and went to his new found punishment. He drove a little ways until he found the Idris Animal Shelter. He parked and made his way into the freshly painted building. It wasn't a very big place, but it was the right size. He saw cats behind plastic doors with air holes, and cages lined the place filled with dogs. It was really loud in there as well. He knew he would have a headache when he left this place. It smelled awful as well, and the weird part was no one was here. No one that he saw anyway, he was the only one in the main part of the building.  
"Hello?" Jace called out in a loud tone. Maybe I'll actually get out of this after all, he thought when no one answered for a minute.  
"In here." A female voice answered from behind a cracked door. Jace went in to find an office. The desk in the center was cluttered with papers and coffee mugs, and the black chair had its back to him. He sat down in a chair placed promptly in front of the big desk. He looked at the walls and saw many drawings and pictures. He examined the drawings of cats and dogs, along with pictures of a little boy and a couple. There were very excellent drawings, and ones that looked like a 5 year old had done them. He liked the humble office, he wanted to spend as much time as he could in here.

The big black chair turned around and what he expected to see was an old fat lady, he saw a young girl. Not just any young girl, but the ginger that went to his school. Clary. He gaped at her with utter amazement. This was her office. She was wearing a green t-shirt with the shelters logo on it that hung off the shoulders, with a black tank top underneath. Her hair hung about her in wild curls. She had on skinnies and the same old converse. She definitely had a fashion change from the old sweater and boot cut jeans she had on earlier. She looked gorgeous in Jaces' opinion.  
"Jace right?" she asked.  
"That's me." Jace replied flashing her a smile.  
"Okay so what size shirt do you wear?"  
"Medium." She went through a draw and pulled out a shirt and tossed it to him.  
"You will be on campus duty. Can you handle that?"  
"Campus duty?"  
"It means you will take care of the animals while I do paperwork."  
"Why do you even work here? What's the big deal about smelly animals?"  
"My parents own the place. And unlike you I like smelly animals." She gave him a smirk and grabbed a clipboard and handed it to him.  
"I get the feeling you're angry with me." Jace said arching an eyebrow.  
"I'm not angry per say, I'm more aggravated that you probably won't take this seriously."  
"Now what gave you that impression?" Jace mumbled sarcastically and Clary rolled her eyes.  
"Please just don't kill anything." Clary said sitting back down and Jace laughed.  
"You really think I'm that irresponsible? What kind of guy do you take me for?"  
"The cocky popular rich kid who doesn't care about anyone but himself." She said looking him dead in the eye.  
"Ouch. I'm hurt." Jace faked a shocked expression.  
"You would think since your dad is part of the doctors at with curing cancer and all, some of that whole helping people thing would rub off on you." She muttered to level she thought only she could hear but Jace picked it up.  
"How'd you know Robert worked at St. Idris?" Only he and his group of friends knew about his adoptive father. Not that he was keeping it a secret or anything, but no one ever asked. And since was a cancer hospital hardly anyone knew he was even a doctor.  
"Just get to work." She said changing the subject. He gave her an odd look and went to work. Clary Fray was definitely a mystery.

**What did you think so far? It was just a random idea I had sorry if it's awful. Anyway please REVIEW~**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay so yeah this is like a walk to remember but I'm putting my own spin on things. The tiny details like Jace being a bad boy and the cancer thing and Clary's father being a minister are the same but it will not be anything at all like a walk to remember. I love that movie but I'm also trying to mix in my own things. Clary's not going to be the holy saint that Jamie was in the movie and Clary will have better taste in clothes. And the cancer thing will be taken in an entirely different direction (that does not mean Clary won't die and doesn't mean she will either lol) but yeah. Jace will be a little more bad ass and stuff than Landon is. Anyways thanks for the reviews and here is your next chapter!**

Jace worked his ass off to get everything done. He had to bath dogs, clip toenails, and refill food and water; not for just one animal but for tons of dogs and cats. By the end of the day, he was covered in fur and smelled of wet dog, and his fingers looked like raisins. He needed a shower bad, but he wanted to go talk to Clary to see if she needed anything. He slipped into her office and knocked on the wall behind him. She was typing away on the computer. "Finished?" She asked standing.  
"Yes. Need anything else?" He asked plopping down on the seat in front of the desk. She scrunched her nose when she got closer.  
"No but you need a shower." She waved a stack of papers in front of her.  
"Really I think I pull off the wet dog scent quite nicely." He flashed her a grin and crossed his arms.  
"You keep thinking that." She put the papers down on the desk and went out of the office. He followed her closely. She checked all the dogs and cats.  
"What are you doing?" Jace asked arching is brow.  
"Making sure you didn't kill anything." She finished looking then stood in the middle of the floor with him. "I guess you can go home." She heaved a sigh and he laughed.  
"What? Going to miss me?" Clary rolled her eyes and went back to her office. Jace continued to laugh as he went to his car. He pulled out his keys and hopped in his car then drove home.  
~Clary~

Clary went back into her office and listened to when Jace left. She had to admit, he didn't do a bad job. She grabbed her bag and locked up. She got in her car and headed home. On the way however she stopped at the 24 hour coffee shop and grabbed her favorite drink, a Coco Loco. She set the drink down in the cup holder then rounded the corner to home.  
She walked in the entryway and then started to the kitchen. "Hey mom." Clary said plopping on the bar stool.  
"Hey sweetie." Jocelyn replied kissing her on the head before opening the fridge. "What do you want for dinner? Luke isn't being very helpful." She tried to say it in a hushed tone but Luke heard anyway.  
"I resent that." Luke said from the couch in the living room. Jocelyn stuck out her tongue at Luke. Clary laughed, especially when her parents acted like teenagers.  
"So anyway what would you like for dinner? I have pasta, pizza, ravioli, mac and cheese. What will it be? Tonight is your night." Clary opened her mouth to answer when her phone rang. She picked it up and looked at the caller I.D. Simon. I should have know, she mentally scolded herself then answered.  
"Hey Simon."  
"Fray!" Clary chuckled at his enthusiasm. "What are you doing?" He asked her.  
"Nothing just got home. You?"  
"I'm heading to your house for dinner." It didn't surprise Clary that Simon was coming. He always came over unannounced, which was always cool with her parents; he was part of the family. He had stuck by her in her darkest hour and she appreciated him for it, he was her rock.  
"Cool so I'll see you in a few minutes?"  
"Yep. See ya." And with that Clary closed her phone.  
"Who was that?" Luke asked coming into the kitchen.  
"Who do you think?" Clary said and looked at Luke realistically.  
"Simon." Her parents said at the same time. Then they both laughed and kissed. Jocelyn had started pasta; she knew Clary would never make a decision. Clary went upstairs and jumped in the shower. She started washing off the sweat and animal smell when she heard Simon yell her name through the house when he arrived.  
Clary rolled her eyes and finished shampooing and rinsing her hair. She got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her, wringing the excess water out of her hair after she did so. She patted to her room and picked out the Vampire Knight shirt Simon had gotten her for Christmas and a pair of black sweats. She slipped on a bra and underwear then through on the clothes. She went to the bathroom and brushed through her unruly red locks. After she made her look presentable she started down the hall. Some warm liquid started dripping out her nose. She touched her fingers to it and examined it in the light.  
~Simon~

After he arrived at Clary's house he took his seat on the couch and watched tv. Luckily Code Geass was on so he began watching it. "Wash up for dinner Simon." Jocelyn said as her and Luke made dinner. He grumbled a bit then went over to the sink. They acted like his real parents most of the time, but that was alright. He liked being treated as a family member in some ways, but in others, not so much. Mainly because he loved Clary, but he knew she didn't feel the same, which was extremely depressing but he wanted her to be happy. Simon, of course, would do everything he could to protect her from bad people. She was special.  
"So Simon how was school today?" Jocelyn asked chopping some parsley.  
"Okay I guess. I mean it was school." Luke laughed a bit and Jocelyn smiled.  
"What about you?"  
"I'm interested to know this new boy that's working at the animal shelter." Luke stirred the noodles in a pot on the stove then turned down the flame on the meat sauce.  
"Who is it?" Simon asked, his curiosity sparking.  
"Jace Lightwood, or something like that. You know him?" Simon scoffed at the question. Everyone knew Jace. He was the egotistical prankster that got all the girls because of his looks.  
"He's a big jerk. Why is he there anyway?"  
"He got in trouble and the principal wants him to do community service." Of course, Simon thought. Jace wouldn't volunteer his time, he was to self centered. His family on the other hand was nice. He had talked to Izzy and Alec once, they seemed sweet. He had never met their mother but she volunteered at the hospital when she wasn't working. Robert was a savior in Simons' eyes, he had helped hundreds of people living with cancer and he wasn't a bad guy either.  
"Not surprising Jace is –" He was interrupted by Clary yelling for them.  
"What is it dear?" Luke asked listening closely to any sound in the hallway. Just then Clary walked down the hall with a nose bleed. Everyone froze.  
"I think it came back." Simon's heart sank in his chest. Jocelyn gave Clary a tissue and asked Luke to get his keys.

_This can't be happening, not again._

**Well what did you think of chapter two? I didn't know really how to approach it but I thought this worked well enough.  
REVIEW!~**


	3. Chapter 3

**He people you guys are amazing! So here is your next chapter of My Angel**!

Clary sat in the backseat squeezing Simons' hand very hard. She was scared and he could tell. He squeezed back in reassurance that everything would be okay. Simon didn't want it to be true but it probably was. She was out of remission. He watched the rain start to splutter on the windshield, deep in thought. He sighed heavily and came into view. They dropped Clary and Simon off out front then parked the car. Clary, with her best friend and family, made her way into the hospital and went up to the reception desk.

~Clary~

The woman at the desk smiled and looked at them. Jocelyn took the lead and gave the woman a very serious look.  
"Is Dr. Lightwood here?" She asked the woman.  
"Yes he is." She replied.  
"Can we see him? It's urgent." Luke said from behind my mother. The woman gave them a wait here and disappeared down the hall. Clary sat in the chair feeling a bit dizzy then relaxed. She didn't want to be here, she had hoped she never would have to return but there was nothing she could do. She knew this was going to happen again sooner or later, but if she had to choose it would have been later. Her mother and Luke were certainly not ready to deal with this again. She remembered when she actually found out she had it. It was about two years ago and her and Simon were hanging out in her room since Clary didn't feel well.  
_Flashback_

_Clary had a fever, so she and Simon were hanging out in her room. He was reading her silly books while she lay in bed. She had been sick a lot lately and this was the worst infection yet. She was dizzy, her bones ached, and she had been having nose bleeds. Her mother and sent her to bed each time thinking it was just something that had been going around, today though, was different. She didn't enjoy Simons' readings or entertainment like she usually had, which was weird. Simon went to get her mother and she took her to the doctor._

_They waited in the lobby patiently at Idris Hospital, waiting to be taken back. Clary explained to her family doctor what had been taking place and he decided to take some blood. They pricked a needle in her and Clary and her family went home. The days were agonizing as she waited for the results. Her mom and she would pace and Luke would find things to do around the house so the days wouldn't get to him. _

_But finally the phone rang.  
"Hello." Jocelyn said answering.  
"Hello we have your daughter Clary's test results." Luke, Clary, and of course Simon, came over when Jocelyn gave them a signal. "I'm afraid you'll have to bring the family in. It's pretty shocking news." Clary searched her mother's eyes for answers when Jocelyn hung up.  
"He wants to see us." That was all Luke needed before grabbing the keys._

_It wasn't long before Clary found her in the office of her family doctor. He came in shortly after they arrived, shutting the door behind him. He was very quiet and didn't look at them for a few moments. The tension started to pick at them all. He looked between them.  
"Well?" Her mother asked not wanting to wait any longer.  
"I have good news and bad news. Which would you like to hear first?" The old man said opening, what Clary guessed, was her file.  
"Bad news." Luke answered hoping the good would triumph the bad. But nothing could prepare any of them what was about to happen.  
"I'm very sorry Clarissa but you have leukemia." Cancer, Clary thought, I have…cancer. There must have been some mistake. Jocelyn immediately started to cry and Luke held her. Simon was totally speechless.  
"What are our options?" Luke said clearly upset.  
"That is actually the good news. St. Idris a few blocks away will take good care of Clarissa. and his team of specialists are the best of the best. And Clary has a very treatable cancer."  
"Cancer isn't treatable." Luke glared.  
"Yes but chemo should put it into remission."  
"What do you mean?" Jocelyn asked, face streaked with tears.  
"Clary has what we call Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia, or ALL which is common for kids 15 and under. And since is of course 14 she had an increased risk of receiving it. Now since I'm no specialist I cannot tell you anything more about it. I'm very sorry."_

_End of Flashback_

Clary had always imagined being 16 since she was very little but she never expected this. Hopefully though it would go back into remission very quickly like it did when she found out she had it the first time. It only took 6 months. Of course, she had to miss a few months of school, and her mother hired a tutor so she was homeschooled her 8th grade year. She spent a lot of time inside over the summer before 9th grade. She had follow up chemo after her cancer went into remission and soon her hair grew back and she was a normal high school student. She went to school her second semester of 9th grade and everything had been fine. Clary was not worried about school; the thing that had upset her was that she was going to lose all her hair again. She hated the fact that she would have to grow it all back once more, and she didn't want to miss school with Simon again or any of her other close friends.

She heaved a sigh and stood when she saw Dr. Lightwood. He greeted them with warm smile. "Clary I wish I wouldn't be seeing you." He hugged her and gave a handshake to Luke.

"Nice seeing you again, of course I wish it wasn't under these circumstances." Luke said to Robert.  
"Alright Clary let's take you back and draw some blood and see what we can dig up." One thing about St. Idris was they had the nicest people in the world working there. Clary headed back with her family and Simon. The nurse came in and drew blood. Afterwards, Clary was givin a night gown and she went to the bathroom to change. When she came out, Simon gave her a nod meaning it was back. Dr. Lightwood turned and looked at her.  
"It is back, but not as bad as it was the first time." Clary sat on the bed and sighed. Dr. Lightwood touched her shoulder. "It'll be okay. We'll get you into remission just as fast or maybe faster than the last time." Clary smirked. "That's a girl." Robert made each of his patients special. He made you believe you were the only one he was taking care of, when in reality he was taking care of hundreds of thousands of people. Jocelyn, Simon, and Luke sat in the corner holding hands.  
"Will she be on the same chemo schedule as last time?" Luke asked.

"Well I think instead of a 1 week wait before chemo sessions we'll have a 2 week resting period." Dr. Lightwood replied.  
"I'm getting a VAD too right?" Clary asked and Robert nodded. Clary had worn a VAD or venous access device the last time. It was a tube that went in your neck or below your collar bone. The tube was slipped down in your main vein that was close to your heart. Part of the tube hung out and was connected to a port, which kind of looked like the end of a stethoscope. The port was taped to your body and a short tube hung from that with little plastic things you screwed the iv into, to get your chemo. It was a good thing in some ways. You would have to be pricked with needles all the time and blood could also be drawn. But bad because it was always there, and you had to be careful with it. **(If anyone would like to get a better understanding of what it looks like there is a link to a pic on my profile)** "We can hook it up tonight and start chemo as soon as possible." Clary looked at her family and friend then back at Robert. It was going to be a long journey. She had a gut feeling of this. 

~Later~

Clary had her VAD on before she knew it. The surgeon had been very careful to slip it in. It felt weird hanging there, but Clary didn't mind. It didn't bother her as much as it had the first time. She was used to it by now. Dr. Robert brought in an IV bag full of the poison that would kill her deadly disease. She didn't want to lose her hair, but she didn't want to die either. Not that she was afraid of death she just doesn't know how she'll die. Robert hooked her up to her chemo and she was giving a bed pan for her vomit. As it pumped she felt nauseas, so you could have guessed what happened next.

It was definitely going to be a long, disgusting, tiring journey.

**Well there you go! Hope you liked it kinda depressed me a bit writing the flashback. Anyways hope you liked REVIEW PLEASE!!!!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hiya! I'm so bored so I wrote you another chapter and as I'm typing it is 11:24 p.m. Full house is on and my friend megan is over and I'm not paying attention to either lol jk love you megan! Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing! I didn't think I would get thirty something reviews this fast. You guys are amazing!  
**Simon~  
Simon walked got up the next morning in the hospital. Clary had stayed overnight and so had he. He knew he had to get up and go to school but he couldn't bring himself to leave Clary. He looked to her sleeping form. She looked like an angel with fiery hair. She stirred at bit, rolling over to turn her back to him. He saw a red strand disconnected from her head. He plucked it off the pillow and bunched it in his hair. That's when he got the most brilliant idea he has ever had. He definitely had enough money for it. It was an expensive thing, because it was authentic but for it was for Clary. He knew her parents wouldn't buy it, they were too busy paying for treatment. He grabbed his coat and headed to his house. He would have to wait until after school but she would love it. He started walking down the hall when he was stopped by a familiar face.  
"Heading out to school Simon?" Luke asked and stopped in front of him.  
"Yeah, where's Jocelyn?"  
"Cafeteria, getting coffee. I actually am glad I caught you. Can you do me a favor?"  
"Sure Luke anything." Simon said with a shrug.  
"Can you tell Jace he has to hold down the fort at the animal shelter for a couple days? Just until Clary is out of the hospital." Simon inwardly groaned. He didn't want to speak to Jace. He would always make fun of him for everything. He didn't want to do it but he felt he had no choice.  
"Of course Luke." Clary's father smiled, patted Simon on the back and headed back to Clary's room.  
Simon took a cab home then changed and grabbed his things. He went to school and kept his phone in his pocket. If anything happened with Clary he would walk out of class not matter what the consequences.  
~Jace

Jace lounged in first period. He chatted with Alec as the teacher took role. "Simon Lewis?" No answer.  
"Has anyone seen Simon?" Jace looked around for a moment, as did everyone else. Jace didn't see Simon which was odd, he knew the nerd was always on time. The door suddenly swung open, displaying a panting Simon.  
"I'm…here…" He managed to breathe out.  
"Mr. Lewis you're late!" The teacher, Mrs. Burner, scolded.  
"I know…but…I'm sorry." Everyone stared at Simon. He looked paler, or maybe that was just Jaces' opinion.  
"Do you have a reason?"  
"Yes…umm…my friend is in the hospital. I stayed overnight, so I didn't have any clothes or school stuff." This snapped Jace to attention. Friend? Hospital? He had only ever seen Clary hang out with Simon. He looked around the room. No Clary. She and Simon were both in his first and third period. She was fine yesterday, Jace thought, I wonder what happened. Simon went over and whispered something in Mrs. Burners' ear. She was very shocked at first, and then nodded to Simon sympathetically. Jace watched with a confused expression. No one else was really paying attention besides him. Simon grabbed a piece of paper to her and sat down. Jace knew it was either serious or Simon was having an affair with the teacher.  
"Excuse me class but I have to step out for a few minutes. Talk amongst yourselves." Simon walked over to Jace, who was now engaged into a conversation with his click. Alec noticed the new presence first then the rest of the group shortly followed.  
~Simon~  
"Jace."  
"Lewis." Simon hated being called by his last name, it drove him completely crazy. "Come to gaze at my beautiful face, hoping some of my beauty will rub off. Well don't get your hopes up, people have tried, none have succeeded." Simon huffed in frustration and rolled his eyes.  
"Look Jace I don't want any of you to rub off on me. Anyways, the reason I came over is to tell you you are in control of the animal shelter until further notice." Jace looked at him perplexed.  
"Why?"  
"Because Clary is in the hospital duh!"  
"Well whatever happened to the nerd she probably deserved it." Aline said snobbishly.  
"What?!" Simon flipped. "Hey Aline! Shut the hell up you dirty whore! Everyone knows you would do anything with anyone!" Aline glared.  
"What was that geek?"  
"Too fast for you?! I can slow it down. Clary is the smartest, sweetest, and most beautiful thing in the world and you have no idea what she is going through! So shut up about things you don't even understand! Clary is 6 times the woman you'll ever be!" Simon stormed out of the class, wanting to calm down. He had never blown up like that before, but he honestly felt better. Mrs. Burner looked at him as he sat outside the door. She understood that he needed to relax, but she didn't know why. Simon looked at her as she entered the doorway to the classroom. Today was going to be a long day.

~Later~  
~Jace~

Jace watched as Simon trudged across the lawn with his hood up. After the little incident Jace was extremely interested on what made Simon tick. He couldn't help but think that Simon wasn't telling people something. He continued to watch Simon jump in his car. Jace waved a goodbye to his group and started to shadow Simon. He followed him for some time, turning one corner after another. Jace wondered where he was going. He hoped that he would find out soon, because he needed to go to the shelter. Finally after 15 minutes Simon stopped in front of a little store. Jace pulled up right behind Simon and looked through his window. It was a wig shop. What the hell was Simon doing in a wig shop? Maybe Simon was secretly a cross dresser. Surprisingly Jace couldn't say he was shocked. He watched through the glass window as Simon was showed a variety of wigs in different colors and lengths. 

After a few minutes Simon selected a red haired wig, which was very similar to Clary's fiery hair and was just the right length as well. He shuddered at the thought of Simon wearing the wig. Simon purchased it and left the store. Jace was tempted to follow Simon but unfortunately he had to go to the damn shelter. He made his way there and went into the office. He picked up the clip board for today and looked at all the things that needed done. He completed all the tasks earlier than yesterday and went back into the office. He sat down in the office chair and looked closely at the pictures on the wall. The blonde could only figure that they were done by Clary. She's a very talented artist; Jace thought as he examined a picture she drew. He abandoned it and got onto the computer. Jace saw the black screen say resuming window. He wouldn't need a password. Good. He didn't want to invade her privacy but he was interested in this peculiar girl. More than he ever had in his life. He had never been so curious about one girl, maybe because she was so mysterious and he enjoyed her not fawning over him all the time. As soon as her computer turned it brought up her background, her and Simon in snow gear, tubing on the class trip, Jace enjoyed that trip, he and Aline….well you get the picture. Jace examined the picture closely when an instant message popped up.  
**(A/N: Italics is Jace, bold is other person)  
Living_Strong123: Hey Girl!  
**Jace froze. This person thought he was Clary. What should he do?  
_ClareBear: Hey what's up?  
_**Living_Strong123: Nothing much. How are you? Everything still cool and all?  
**Jace didn't know how to respond. He was at the assumption Clary was in the hospital. Maybe he would find out what was wrong from this person.  
_ClareBear: No, in the hospital.  
_**Living_Strong123: AWHHHH! NO! Why?! Is everything okay?! Is it as bad as it was before?!  
**_ClareBear: I don't know.  
_**Living_Strong123: I hope everything will be okay. I'm sorry it didn't last as long as you wanted it to. I truly wish it had.  
**Jace was honestly confused at this point. He didn't have a clue what they were talking about.  
_ClareBear: Don't say that. I wouldn't want you too.  
_**Living_Strong123: But I wish it did. It's so awful. Are you still going to walk this weekend?"  
**_ClareBear: Walk?  
_**Living_Strong123: You don't remember? It's the walk for the survivors. In Michigan? Remember?  
**_ClareBear: Oh. I doubt it. I have no idea how long they will keep me here.  
_**Living_Strong123: *sighs* I wish you could come! We had so much fun last year! Your mom was amazing as well!  
**_ClareBear: Thanks. I had a blast!  
_**Living_Strong123: I'll be sure to send everyone your love! :)  
**_ClareBear: Thanks so much.  
_**Living_Strong123: Anyways on a lighter note, have you made any progress with that Jace guy you were telling me about?  
**Jace arched an eyebrow. Clary talked about him with others? And what did this person mean by progress.  
_ClareBear: What do you mean by progress?  
_**Living_Strong123: Oh come on, you know what I mean. You've had crush on him since I've known you.  
**Jace grinned. Clary had a crush on him, which made him very happy to know.  
_ClareBear: No. But I hope so soon.  
_**Living_Strong123: You have more guts than I do. I could never have the courage to do it especially with no hair. I mean some girls may be into that stuff but not any girl that I'm into.  
**_ClareBear: No hair?  
_**Living_Strong123: I shaved it. I haven't been doing to good either. I'm going to lose it anyway so I said what the hell.**  
_ClareBear: Oh. I'm sorry.  
_**Living_Strong123: Unless you would be willing to date me?  
**_ClareBear: I don't think so.  
_**Living_Strong123: Sorry if I ask too much. I know you don't feel that way with me.  
**_ClareBear: It's cool.  
_**Living_Strong123: Well I gotta go! Ttys!  
**_ClareBear: You too!  
**Living_Strong123 has signed off.  
ClareBear has signed off**_

Jace's conversation with this guy was making his head spin. He had so many questions and not any answer. He turned off the computer and locked up the shelter.

~Simon~  
Simon returned to the hospital after his trip to the wig shop. He walked into Clary's room with a big smile on his face. Clary was awake and laying in bed. She looked at Simon when he walked in. Jocelyn and Luke also turned their heads.  
"What are you so happy about?"  
"I got you a present." He showed off the box.  
"A present? You didn't have to do that Simon." Clary smiled. "What is it?"  
"You could always open it and find out." He handed over the box and watched her open it. She removed the lid and tissue paper and froze. "I thought you might want it for when your hair is gone. You could wear it out and to school if you want. If you're going to school that is." Simon looked to Jocelyn and Luke.  
"Only if she wishes too." Luke said and Simon glanced at Clary who continued to stare into the box. She lifted the wig gingerly out of it and smiled up at him.  
"Thank you Simon." She hugged him and kissed his cheek. "You are the greatest best friend in the world.

**So what did you think? Love it, hate it? I personally love it!  
PPLEASE REVIEW!  
I also need an idea of how Jace should find out about Clary having cancer… so pm me or comment!  
Thanks!!!!**


	5. Chapter 5

**HEY PEOPLE! I LOVE YOU! BUT I….want some more REVIEWS! PLEASE! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!! Sorry lol but anyway I can't not decide what to freakin do! I don't know how Jace should find out! Why does everyone's idea have to be so awesome?! : It makes me very happy yet sad. I can't decide! GRRRR!**

**Chapter 5~  
**"See you later Dr. Lightwood. " Clary said groaning from putting her coat on. Jocelyn tried to be as careful as possible, but Clary was having aches from the chemo.  
"The aches should only last for today and maybe tomorrow, but if you don't feel up to it, don't go to school." He scribbled a note and handed it to her. "This is for the office. I'm sure Simon has told them but it's nice to have proof." Clary finally got her coat on and hugged him gently.  
"Thanks." Clary turned to her mother. "Let's get out of here." Clary walked at her own pace towards the door to exit the hospital. Jocelyn helped her daughter go easily towards the car after they left the hospital. She opened the door and relaxed in the front seat to the Sedan. Clary fastened her seatbelt and shut the door. She waited for her mother to get in and they headed home.

As soon as they got home Clary went to her room and lay down. She groaned at the relief of the relaxing of her muscles. She felt sick, and if her muscles could talk they would scream. She felt so tired so she decided to sleep. She was defiantly going to need to rest if she was even going to think about going to school. After a while of sleep she got up to Jocelyn shaking her. She had guessed she had only been to sleep for a few hours but in reality she had rested until it was time for school the next day.  
"Clary wake up it's time for school." She whispered softly in Clarys' ear. "Are you going?" Clary groaned a yes and got up.  
"I have this for you." Jocelyn held out a glass with a red liquid in it. Clary sipped it, tasting a splash of vegetables on her tongue. V8 juice. Ew, Clary thought as she gave her mother a disgusted look. "Don't give me that look. You didn't eat dinner last night and you need fruits and veggies. Its in the form of juice in case you don't feel like eating it." Clary sighed at her mother. The red head gladly appreciated her mother, and she knew she was right but still. Vegetables in the form of juice, who ever thought of that? Clary took another drink. She had to drink it all, one because she needs her vitamins and everything if she wanted a chance to send her cancer in remission once more; and two her mother would flip if she didn't. Clary pulled on her favorite pair of skinnies and her black and white Flogging Molly long sleeve shirt. She grabbed her black hoodie from her desk chair and went to the bathroom, with her wig in hand. As she flipped on the light and looked in the mirror she saw many bald spots in her red locks. She ran her comb through it and more giant clumps fell around her. She set the wig box on the counter then moved the tissue paper.  
She grabbed the wig and styled it to her liking then set the stand up and put it on top of it. Clary pulled her remaining red curls up into the wig cap and then placed the wig firmly on her head. She gave a bemused smile at her reflection. No change. She looked just like she had before she started losing her hair. Clary grabbed her back pack and finished her drink. She went downstairs and sat on the couch. She got out her phone and texted Simon.

_Hey Simon.  
_**Hey Clary.  
**_Coming to get me?  
_**You know it. Be there in a few.  
**_Okay. I'm wearing the wig btw.  
_**Can't wait to see it!  
**Clary put her phone away and sighed. She was still tired but she was excited to go back to school. She had so much work to catch up on and it would be tedious and tiring but she was still happy. When Clary was diagnosed with leukemia she realized one thing. Every day is a gift, not a right. You also have to take a look at the little things. Sometimes we move to fast we don't even notice them, but Clary did and still does. She looked out the window when Simon honked the horn.  
"Clare Bear, if you feel sick or too tired please call me and I'll pick you up." Clary smiled at her mother and kissed her on the cheek.  
"I will I promise." And with that Clary made her way to the door then Simons' car.  
~At School~  
~Jace~  
Jace had gotten up late along with the rest of the Lightwoods and had to rush to school. He was usually the one that got Izzy and Alec up because their mother and father left early in the morning. Robert went to work and Maryse ran errands. But today Jace overslept. He was too busy thinking about Clary, Living_Strong123, and how weird Simon was acting. Luckily though, they had made at an okay time, and still had time to socialize. As he walked in he noticed a certain red head in a black jacket. Clary. His mind ran through so many questions he wanted to ask but couldn't. She would tell him. Probably. Maybe. Most defiantly not. He made a b-line towards her, scanning his eyes over her. Her hair was shiny and beautiful but yet he couldn't focus on that. His eyes blazed at a small tube in her neck. This only brought more questions.  
He walked over to her. "Hey….Clary." She looked at him for a few moments with a weird expression.  
"Jace are you lost?"  
"No I just wanted to say hi."  
"Oh…hey then."  
"I want to ask you something." Jace looked at Clary and smiled. Clary looked at Simon and he shrugged.  
"Okay then ask."  
"Do you think you might- I mean do you want to…Do you wanna…" Jace couldn't get out the words. He had never had trouble asking a girl something before.  
"Yes?" She edged him to go on. Jace swallowed hard and looked into her eyes.  
"Go out with me."  
**Well there you are. What will Clary's answer be? Will Jace get the answers to his questions? Who knows?! Oh wait I do LOL! REVIEWW!!!!  
Push that beautiful button! Oh and I have a writing contest at school soon wish me luck!**


	6. Chapter 6

**  
Hehehe I updated! YAY! So yeah I love you people and check out my new story: Cars  
LOLOLOLOLOL It's amazing!**

Clary's mouth dropped open in utter shock. "You want to go out with me?" Jace nodded and continued to stare.  
"You and Me? On a date?"  
"That's what it means to go out with someone." Simon looked between the two teens with wide eyes.  
Clary couldn't believe what was happening. She didn't know how to respond. She had liked Jace for a while and dreamt about this moment often. She was about to answer when reality set in.  
"You lose a bet or something? Are there hidden cameras somewhere?"  
"No, but I wouldn't doubt about the cameras. I mean who wouldn't want this gorgeous face on their TV station?" Clary rolled her eyes and looked back at Simon.  
"One date."  
"No." Clary answered and it almost hurt her to reject him.  
"Spelled Y.E.S." Jace retorted.  
"Spelled N.O." Jace sighed and continue to stare. "What?" Clary asked after a while, turning back to Jace.  
"Look I really want to get to know you and this is the only way I know how. I've only thought about you for the past couple days, and you leave me in questions. Just please, go out with me?"  
Clary studied him for a few moments, not believing a single lick of what he was saying. "I said no. Get it? Got it? Good." And with that she turned around and went to class. Jace was left stupefied. Most girls flocked to his mere presence; of course Clary wasn't most girls. Jace watched her retreating figure and noticed something different about her. He couldn't put his finger on it, but he just knew. He and Simon were left in the crowded hallway together. Simon looked over Jace with a very serious expression that caught his attention.  
"What?" Jace asked innocently.  
"Just stop it." Simon seethed.  
"Stop what?"  
"Listen, you aren't going to play games with Clary like you do with your other girls. Clary is special. And besides she is already going through enough shit as it is and she doesn't need you making it worse."  
"I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about." Jace replied. He could tell his reputation of charming and sleeping with someone perceived him. Of course at the moment he didn't fell to proud of it. "I'll give you the sort version. Don't make the mistake of hurting her; if you do I'll hunt you down. So stay away from her. Got it?" Simon shoved Jace a little then headed the same direction as Clary.  
Jace pondered the conversation between him and Simon all day. He occasionally looked at Clary and Simon was right there glaring. It annoyed Jace to death but there wasn't much he could do about it. What was worse is that he wouldn't get to see her today at the shelter. It was his day off and he was helping his dad at the hospital, filing paperwork. The thought of hours of filing didn't really thrill him but his mother forced him to. Spring sport started today and Alec was doing basketball and Izzy was doing tennis. He should have been doing basketball as well but after he had gotten in trouble for the sprinkler incident he was forbidden from it.

After school finished he went to the hospital in no hurry at all. He hadn't really been in St. Idris before but he heard his father talk about it often. As he pulled up to the hospital, he got out and went inside. The doors slid open and he stepped in. He went to the front desk.  
"I'm looking for Robert Lightwood." He informed the girl behind the counter. He couldn't deny she was gorgeous. She had wavy blonde hair and rosy cheeks. She smiled and looked at him.  
"He's is with a patient. Do you have an appointment?"  
"He's my father. I was supposed to help out around here today."  
"Oh that's right you're Jace. Come with me I'll show you what you need to do." Jace nodded and followed the skinny girl. She led him back to his fathers' office and took him inside. The place looked like a tornado had hit it. Papers were everywhere, so much so you couldn't tell where the desk even was. Jace knew his father was messy but not like this.  
The girl showed him the filing cabinets that were marked treating, remission, and deceased. "All you have to do is take all those files and put them as categorized. Got it?" Jace nodded and the girl left. He looked to the 10 heaping mounds of files. Better cancel any plans he had tonight.

~Clary~  
After school Clary went home and slept. She never realized how school, if you weren't homeschooled, could be so tiring. Her mother kept waking her periodically though, so she got hardly any shut eye. After about the 3rd time Clary could fall back asleep, she felt too nauseous. She smelled food which made it even worse, and ultimately made her barf. Repeating this several times, she just decided to stay in the bathroom. She removed her wig and put it on the stand when her mother knocked on the door.  
"You okay Clary?" An older version of her popped in.  
"No, it's a bad day." Clary would use the term 'bad day' when she was feeling tired and just plain sick. She would use the word 'good day' when she felt up to doing things and eating. Her family and Simon established this code the first time around. So if it ever happened in public they could just say bad day instead of I've been puking and sleepy.  
"I told you Clary if-"  
"I know mom. But I wanted to go to school and stay there today. I only had to use the 'bathroom'4 times today. That is, if you don't count now."  
"Can you try and eat for me?"  
"Liquefy it and all drink dinner." It sounded gross but it was the only way she would get to eat dinner by drinking. Clary shivered at the thought, but hey, she had worse things. Her mother did so and took it to Clary with a look of distaste. This would be the only time a mom could ever say drink your dinner young lady. Clary laughed and pushed back a hurl as she drank the disgusting liquid.  
~Jace~

Jace had been working through the files forever. He would open each one and look at the paper stamped remission, pending, or deceased. The pictures of the people were either sad or happy. Jace had filed mostly under remission, which made him feel happy for that person in some way. After he looked at the stamp he would look at the name on the tab sticking out and file it in order.

The process was long and tedious but was a time passer to say the least. His father had checked on him earlier for a minute then went back to work. Robert could definitely use an assistant, Jace thought as he picked a heavy folder up. He flipped it open and his eyes widened. He looked at the picture, and then shut his eyes. He must be seeing things. Jace opened his eyes back up and nothing changed. Clary Fray was the name printed on the side of the tab. A million things went through Jaces' mind. He remembered their conversations, Simon's warning, seeing Clary with a tube in her neck. Everything was all because Clary had cancer. _Cancer._ His Clary had cancer. Well not actually his Clary, but now he knew. Why she knew his dad, why she was in the hospital, everything. Jace sat down in the soft, cushy, black chair behind his father's desk. He read over the file thoroughly. The stamp of course said she was going through treatment but she had been in remission until recently. He read on about her diagnoses, her treatment schedule, he read over everything then sat back. He tried to take in everything. He had a lot of emotions once it finally sank in. But mostly anger. Why would someone punish her? She was so sweet and loving. Why should she be punished? He felt like he needed to go to her in that instant. It was weird and something that he'd never felt before, but it was still there. He never moved though. _Clary,_ he thought,_ I'm here..._

**Tehe what did you think? Love it? Hate it? Leave Reviews! Oh and btw I wrote a story called Cars! Check it out! Thanks Love you guys. Btw my beta (BlondeHairBlueEyes14) is epic! She gave me the idea for this chapter!**


	7. Chapter 7

****

You people are wonderful and me not so much. I fail at updating! I have just been very busy lately with school. I would have update Friday but I went to the new moon release party and didn't have time to update.

Jace had finished filing, placing Clary's folder gently in the cabinet. He looked at her address and knowing exactly where she lived, grabbed his keys. He had to get to her…quickly. He grabbed the brass door knob and swung it open then was on his way. He reached the lobby, waved a goodbye to his father then went to his car. When he made it to the car, he got it and pushed his keys into the ignition. Then he stopped. He couldn't go. What was he going to say? He couldn't help her, she was sick not hurt. He sighed and sat back. He had never felt so helpless before. He was always told every problem had a solution, and you can do anything you put your mind to. But they forgot to mention some problems are only for certain people. And Clary's problem was for his father to solve. He groaned in acknowledgement of this. He hated this feeling, but he liked Clary. He had to learn to deal with this if he was going to be near Clary. And he was going to be  
near her, he needed to be. He didn't know why he felt so different with her. He wanted to be a better person for her. He wanted her to want him. It was a confusion feeling he had in him but he just felt he had to be near her all the time or he felt as if he would suffocate.  
Jace backed out of the driveway of the hospital and sent out for Clary.  
~Clary~  
Clary had finished her dinner drink she laid down again and flipped on her flat screen tv that was displayed in her room. She flipped through channels when she finally found one of her favorite shows Secret Life of The American Teenager. She hadn't really been watching it lately but she knew she would soon be caught up, that is, if she could keep her eyes open. She tried as hard as she could trying to watch the show in front of her. It was getting to the good part and she didn't want to miss it but she slowly dozed off. It was so hard to stay awake, she thought before she fully slept.  
~Jace~  
Jace made it to the front of Clary's red brick house. It was nice and probably plenty big enough for her family but it wasn't the estate his father had. Its shudders were a dark green and it had a garden placed promptly on the left side. He pulled into the driveway and got out of the car. He followed the stoned walkway to the porch but to the big oak door. He was instantly unsure of if he should do this or not. He started back down the walkway before he turned to the door again and rang the doorbell. He wasn't going to be a coward, not now. He waited for a few moments before an older version of Clary opened the door. She had a darker shade of red than Clary and looked more serious and taller. She was thin and dressed in dark jeans and a gray t-shirt and was covered in paint. She was wiping her hands on a dishtowel when she answered the door. She smiled at him and he froze.  
"Hello. Can I help you?" She said in a sweet voice.  
"Yeah…um…Is Clary home?"  
"Yes she is, are you a friend of hers?" Jace was kind of confused on how to answer this. He knew Clary had a crush on him but he hadn't really talk to her for very long and knew they weren't really friends like this woman meant.  
"Well not really but I really need to talk to her."  
"Alright I'll go tell her you're here. What's your name?"  
"Jace Lightwood." The woman's smile got bigger.  
"You're the boy that's working at our shelter." Jace nodded to her. "And Robert's son if I'm not mistaken." Jace noticed a sort of awe in her eyes when she said this. Jace nodded to her once more.  
"Why don't you come in?" Clary's mother moved from the doorway and Jace entered the cozy house. He noticed Luke sitting on the couch watching a basketball game on tv and smelled a heavy waft of a pie cooking. Clary's mother shut the door and came up behind him.  
"Luke this is Jace Lightwood, Robert's son." Luke looked to his wife and Jace and smiled.  
"Yes, you work at our shelter. Now that I see you, I recognize you from church." Luke got up shaking his hand. "Quite a trouble maker you are. How's your family?"  
"They're okay. I just got done helping out my father at the hospital today. You wouldn't believe what his office looks like. Flooded with files and papers." Jocelyn chuckled a bit.  
"Oh we believe it, he's a busy man." Luke responded. " so what brings you here?"  
"Oh…um.. I wanted to see Clary actually."  
"I'll go get her for you." Jocelyn said taking herself up the stairs. Luke looked to Jace and gestured for him to sit. An awkward silence set in around them. Unlike his father, Jace wasn't a big talker and didn't really hold conversations well unless he was truly interested in it. Jace shifted uncomfortably on the couch and Luke continued to watch the game.  
~Clary~  
Clary had awoken from her slumber to find Jocelyn bending over her. "Clary sweetie, are you up to seeing anyone? You have a visitor downstairs." Clary let out a groan and rolled over.  
"Send them up here." She sighed out into her pillow.  
"Are you sure? I can tell him to come back." Clary's eyes snapped open.  
"Who is it?" She asked shakily.  
"Jace Lightwood." She knew her mother was smiling. Clary swung her legs over the bed and went to the bathroom.  
Tell him I'll be down in a minute." Clary told Jocelyn and she went downstairs. Clary put on her wig and a shirt to hide her VAD then put on skinny jeans. She started down the stairs quicker than she should of and had to stop at the dizziness she felt. After she held her head for a few seconds she walked down the stairs to Jace. He immediately stood when he saw her and looked her over.  
"Hey Jace."  
"Hey Clary. Can I talk to you somewhere private?"  
"Yes you can." Clary took Jace upstairs to her room after a quick glance at her mother to see if it was okay. It was and when they reached Clary's room, she sat down on her bed and Jace in her desk chair.  
"What did you want to talk about? Wait why're you here? You get lost? How did you get my address?"

Jace put a hand over her mouth to muffle any other questions and Clary pushed it away.  
"One question at a time, okay? I'll answer all your questions if you let me talk." Clary nodded for him to continue. "I was filing papers in my dad's office and I came across your file." Clary looked at him with wild angry eyes.  
"So you came here because you found out I had leukemia?" She scoffed. " The pity train stops nowhere does it?"  
"Just listen to me. That's not why I came here."  
"Then why did you? Because you needed to give me comfort. Tell me everything will be okay? Go out with me, fall for me?!"  
"I want to get to know you. Be near you." Clary rolled her eyes and got up.  
"Jace, how low will you go? You think I'll buy that crap and fall into your arms. You have another thing coming if you think that. Look I don't need your sympathy or your pity. I get that enough from teachers. What I do need though is someone who will treatment right. And won't lie to get me into bed." Jace's anger flared.  
"Get you in bed?! That's what you think this is about?!"  
"You're Jace Lightwood. You can get any girl you want. Why would you want me? You didn't care about me before. You and your stupid friends made fun of me." She crossed her arms and glared at him.  
"Clary I just I don't know. I feel like I have to be near you."  
"Why?"  
"Because I like you okay? A lot. If I didn't I wouldn't be trying this hard."  
"Yeah right. Does that work on all your whores?"  
"Don't know never used it on them. I really really really like you. I need to be close to you. It's the only way I can feel like I'm protecting you." Jace poured out what he'd wanted to say for a long time.  
"I don't believe you."  
"Then don't, but please all I'm asking for is a chance."  
"What make you think you deserve one?" Clary looked into his eyes.  
"Because I just do. Don't we all?"  
"No." Clary turned away from him and bit her lip.  
"No what?"  
"Not all of us deserve a chance." Jace stayed silent as he looked at the little red haired beauty that had haunted him beyond his eyelids. Clary closed her eyes. "One chance Jace. One. If you mess up I swear on all that is holy I will never speak to you again." Jace nodded in agreement.  
"So friends?"  
"Not yet. Acquaintances." Clary held her hand out for him to shake but jace shook his head.  
"Friends we shake. Acquaintances, I leave." Clary sighed and caved.  
"Friends then?" Jace grinned and shook her hand. "But friends talk to each other and are around each other at school." Jace hadn't thought about that. He hadn't thought about his reputation at all. He had only thought it was him in Clary in the world as they talked in her small bedroom.  
"Friends." Jace finally said with a smile.  
Jace and Clary talked a little while they lay on her bed. He had been hit a couple times for being an 'asshat' which he had no idea what meant. But it was cute when she fell asleep right next to him. He had tucked her in after moving carefully off the bed. He was still not in the trusting friend category but he didn't mind this. She stirred and rolled over in the place he just was. The lsuh red curls that lay on her head were now lonely laying her pillow. Jace looked at them in shock for a minute then picked them up and looked at a bald Clary. He lifted it to his nostrils and smelled Clary. He smiled and laid it on the desk beside the bed before leaving.  
This was the start of a beautiful friendship. Maybe not so much friendship, it could be more with time, Jae thought on his drive home and went to bed.

**Amazing wasn't it? Lol HaHAHAHAHA I wuvers it! REVIEW**!

**Please read my new story:  
Phobias and Birthday Parties aka Cars!**

**Jace:Finally!  
Clary:What?  
Jace:We are friends.  
Alec:so what does that accomplish?  
Jace:I get to be next to her.  
Magnus:But u still aren't getting any.  
Clary:Any what?  
Jace: Shut it Magnus!**


	8. Chapter 8

**So I've been on spring break since Saturday lol and won't go back until next Monday(even when I go back we have a two hour early dismissal) But anyway you would think I would be quicker at updating but nope. XD Enjoy your next chapter, sorry it's short.**

As Clary walked into school with Simon, she felt happier than ever, she kept replaying her night with Jace over and over, and she liked that they were friends. Clary wore a wide grin as she screwed in her combination for her locker.  
"Okay, why are you so smiley today?" Simon asked leaning against the locker next to hers.  
"I'm just happy. Can I just be happy?" Clary started to grab books when Simon snatched them.  
"No Fray."  
"Simon I'm not going to croak by carrying a couple text books." Clary crossed her arms over her chest and glared.  
"I know I'm just trying to be nice." Clary rolled her eyes and punched him lightly in the arm. She shut her locker and turned to go to class, when her eyes met Jace. He was talking to his friends in a half circle. Clary started towards them, eyes locked with Jace. When she finally reached them they all looked at her like she was from outer space. She ignored their looks and focused on Jace.  
"Hey Jace." She said brightly smiling at him. He looked at her sheepishly and nodded. Clary's gaze turned from happy to confused. "Um, I wanted to ask you if you wanted to hang out after school today. Maybe get some pizza or something." The others started laughing and Jace didn't respond.  
"I think the loser is asking you out Jace." Aline snorted in a snobby tone. Sebastian started making kissy faces at Jace. Everyone joined in the teasing except Izzy and Maia.  
"Jace, aren't you going to say something?" Clary edged him on, trying to make him stand up for her. He looked at her for a minute then looked to the ground. Clary became immediately pissed. "I see how it is. You come to my house and beg to be friends but when it comes to sticking up for me and telling your friends, nothing. You know, I don't think you have the slightest idea of what being a friend means." Clary turned and left before he could see tears fall. She walked back over to Simon, his brow creased with worry.

"You okay?"  
"I'm fine." Clary replied viciously. "Let's go to class." Simon didn't say anything as he followed her. She clearly wasn't in a good mood at all, but it changed so quickly. Not only that but Clary was crying.

As class started Clary took her seat and gave a concealed look at Jace. He was a jackass. A complete and total jackass. _How could he treat me that way?_ Clary met Jaces' eyes as she continued to stare. He gave her a small smirk but Clary turned her nose up at him and looked to the teacher. Clary continued to glance at him all period. She couldn't seem to stop. 

After class Clary gathered her books and started to head out the door when she was stopped by Jace. "What?" She glared at him.  
"I'm sorry about this morn-"  
"Save it, everything is clear as glass to me." Clary wanted nothing more than to punch him in the face right then and there.  
"No it isn't. Look I want to be friends with you but can we just you know." Clary understood perfectly what he wanted. She grinned and nodded to what he was saying.  
"Ohhh, like secret friends." He heaved a sigh of relief but then saw Clary's face turn serious and then she walked out. It was clear Clary didn't want to be secret friends. Jace ran out to her and grabbed her arm, knocking her books all over the floor. People started laughing and Clary looked at him with tear filled eyes then ran.  
"Clary wait!" He was hot on her tail, so close to reaching her when he was tripped. He suddenly felt himself flying through the air and hitting the hard tiled floor. He groaned and looked to see who tripped him. Simon.  
"What the hell?" Jace snapped up at him. Simon kneeled to the floor, with a look of death all over his face.  
"I told you to leave her alone Jace. I meant it to. Don't go near her ever again. Understand?" Jace suddenly became angry.  
"You aren't the boss of me!" He screamed in Simon's face as he got up. "Why don't you mind your own damn business, this is between me and Clary! _Understand?_" Jace huffed and in hysterics barged out of the school after Clary. She was fooling with the keys of her car when Jace found her.  
"Clary…please."  
"No! I gave you a chance Jace Lightwood! You screwed it up, now leave me alone!" He grabbed her arm and turned her towards him. Her cheeks were red, not from tears, but from anger.  
"Clary I'm sorry but why're you so afraid?"  
"Afraid of what?! You treated me like shit this morning! I'm not afraid of anything! Where did that even come from?!" Clary screamed in a steaming fury.  
"You're afraid that someone might actually want to be with you!"  
"And why would that scare me?" Clary challenged him to continue. She waited for a few moments, watching him calm in front of her.  
"Because you want to be with me too." He whispered to her.  
"You don't know what I want."  
"You make excuses!" He yelled at her, nostrils flaring and eyebrows knitted together.  
"No I don't." Clary hissed through her teeth.  
"Yes you do! If it's not your parents, it's your books, your faith, and even your disease." He said calmingly. Clary shut her eyes.  
"I'm not afraid of anything…" She whispered half-heartedly. There was no point trying to make him believe otherwise, he would never believe her. His eyes continued to pierce her, not with anger, but with eagerness like trying to make her give in to him.  
"You are more scared than anyone I've ever met."  
Things were quiet from then on. Neither of them said a word. Clarys' mind was rushing through possible things to say but none wanted to come to the surface. Clary was at a lost, nothing she said could change the fact that she was afraid. And she was. But not of the reasons Jace suspected.  
"I am afraid Jace…" He met her eyes as tears slipped out. "Not of being with someone but leaving them." Jace became confused at the moment, he didn't understand what she meant.  
"I don't follow."  
"Who knows how much time I have left Jace? Who knows if the chemo will work? And who knows if the cancer will spread? Jace I'm not even sure if I'm going to make it to next weekend. One day, a simple sentence, could change my entire life. I can't promise anyone anything, because I don't know if I'll be around to keep it. I don't need a reason to be angry with God." A sob escaped Clary's throat and she immediately got in the car and drove off.  
Jace didn't know what to do as he stood frozen in the parking lot. He ran over what she had said to him and he started to feel dizzy. He sat down against a tree about 2 yards away from him. Clary had basically said to him that one day she would die from this. _Clary…die?_ Jace couldn't even process this. Not his Clary. She couldn't die. She wasn't going to die, not if he had any say in the matter. He would fight god himself with a gang of money ninjas and Chuck Norris, just to have her. **(XD) **Jace would die for her if he had to. He needed her to exist even f they weren't together. Oh hell, now look what was happening to him, she was turning him into Edward Cullen. Next time he turns around, Magnus was going to sprinkle glitter on him and force him to the sunlight. Jace shook his head. Clary was going to be the death of him, and this is what he was sure of. Jace got up and went back inside his prison until 3. He would see her today after school; he just had to focus on that. 

Clary reached home in a fit of cries. She ran inside and up to her room, ignoring her mother's calls for her. She slammed the door and looked around. She had realized everything when talking to Jace. She would one day die from the disease that infected her body. If not this time, then the next. The realization that one day she would have to leave her family, friends, and everyone so young killed her. She wanted to do so much with her life but there wasn't enough time. No, it wasn't that there wasn't enough time; it was that_ she_ didn't have enough time. She wanted to open an art gallery that was all hers and no one else's. She wanted to live in the bustling streets of New York and fall in love. She wanted all these things and more, but she would probably never see the day.

Everything she had ever been angry about seemed to disappear. She couldn't waste her life with worrying, angry, or jealous. She had to live like it was her last day, every day. And the first thing she was going to do is…

**LOL Cliffhanger! Aren't they evil? REVIEW!**


	9. AN: PLEASE READ!

**AN: I regret to inform everyone that I am discontinuing all my stories, as of today, April 1, 2010. I will no longer be posting on fanfiction any longer. I'm really sorry for any inconvenience this has caused anyone. I love you all! I'll still be on fanfic I just won't be posting stories anymore. Sorry again. Thanks for all your support.**

**Thanks, claryxjace  
****P.S. I forgot one more thing….**

APRIL FOOL'S!!!! XD


	10. Chapter 9

That's just it. Clary didn't know what she was going to do next. She had so many things she wanted to do but she didn't know where to start. She grabbed a piece of paper from her backpack, along with a pencil, and began to write. She wrote all the things she wanted to do right now in a list. After she was done she studied it for a while.

_Paint  
Draw  
Jace  
Go to the beach  
Read Every Book By Her Favorite Author  
Learn How To Play An Instrument  
Learn How To Speak A Different Language  
Jace  
Learn To Swim  
Jace…  
JACE.  
JACEEE!_

Clary sighed heavily…she wanted Jace, she knew that. But she wasn't sure if he was just playing games with her or if he was actually serious about the way he felt. She looked at the other things on the list and narrowed her eyes at the one she wanted to do first. Read every book by her favorite author before she goes. The red head got up and grabbed her keys, and her wallet then headed to the bookstore.

~Jace~  
Jace flipped through his year book as soon as he got home and stared down at the black and white pictured pasted on it. There were tons of pictures of students but hers was all that mattered to him. Jace touched the face and the name written beside it. _Clary Fray._ God, why couldn't he get her out of his head? What was wrong with him lately? Had he gone completely bonkers? Should he care this much about one girl? And if he should then why? God, he hated feeling like this all the time. Whenever he was close to her he wanted to touch her, hold her, and tell her everything will be okay. He wanted to protect her from everything. Hide her away and never allow anyone but him to see her. But he couldn't share his feelings with her, he was too afraid. And he didn't exactly know what those feelings were.

Jace did have it slip out that he wanted to be with her. And he did, which was the scary part. He had never wanted anyone before like he did her. He…he…he _needed_ her. And that didn't make since either. He needed to be around her but he couldn't at the same time. Every time he got around her, he got so nervous. His palms became sweaty, his mouth became drier than the Sahara desert, and he stumbled on words in his mind. He felt like he couldn't concentrate at all. He grabbed a pillow and covered his face. He let out an aggravated scream, which soon became muffled. He felt eyes on him as he laid there and uncovered his face.

"What Isabelle?" Jace turned his head and glared at her. She was leaning against the door frame and her black hair flowing in a straight line against her white tank top and pink pajama bottoms. She wore a grin along her face telling Jace she was up to something.  
"Oh don't think I didn't hear what Clary said to the group." Jace was a little confused.  
"What the hell are you talking about? She asked me out for pizza, that's all."  
"I know Clary Fray would not just walk up and ask you out for pizza." Izzy narrowed her eyes at Jace looking for something.  
"I actually am quite appealing to the opposite sex; you'd be surprised how many women confess their love to me." Jace gave her a big wide smile and she rolled her eyes.  
"And they're all bimbos. Look, Clary is a smart girl. She knows what she wants, she's caring, and friendly. And one of the better reasons she is so level headed is because she doesn't care what other people think." Jace's smile faded and his looks became serious.  
"And how do you know so much about Clary?"  
"Because unlike you I care about other people besides myself. I don't laugh at Clary because I know she is better than almost everyone at school. I'm not close with her or anything but if we became best friends, I wouldn't care what other people thought about it. She is a great person Jace. I've seen the way you look at her. And trust me on this one, how many Clarys are you going to meet in this lifetime?" And with that Izzy disappeared down the hall.

Jace went over everything she had just said. She did have a point. She was completely right, but how did he look at her? He was sure he didn't look at her any different than anyone else. But maybe he did. Jace didn't know what to do anymore. He just had to get through until tomorrow, when he would see Clary again. Just until tomorrow, then he would get everything all sorted out.

**Next Day~  
**Jace carried his tray through the lunch room heading to his table when he spotted Clary in the corner. She wore a green t shirt and jeans with converse. Even though it was normal apparel, he thought she looked so gorgeous. Jace made a B line towards her, setting his tray down on the table and pulling up a chair. She was eating what looked like tofu and was reading quietly.  
"Hey where is Simon?" He asked plopping down beside her. She didn't look up from her book at all.  
"He's sick." She took another bite of her sandwich and continued to read. Jace let out a sigh and looked at her longingly.  
"What are you reading?" Clary held the book in his face.  
"Didn't know you were into Shakespeare."  
"Not a surprise." She just wouldn't look at him which was driving him crazy.  
"I'm trying Clary. Okay?...Maybe I miss spending time with you. Maybe you inspire me."  
"Sound like bull." She sneered at him.  
"Which part?" Jace asked.  
"All of it."  
"Well it's not!" She finally looked at him with eyes that were unreadable.  
"Prove it." He stared at her and she smirked.  
"I will. Let's hang out. My house. 8 o'clock. Bring your swimsuit." But before he was even going to give her a chance to reject he covered her mouth. "See you there." Jace walked over to his table with a grin on his face. He sat down next to Sebastian after giving her a wink.  
~Clary~  
Clary found herself in her room pacing. _Oh god, what am I going to do? I can't swim. Shit what was I going to do? Let alone wear! _Clary sat down on her bed just as her mom entered with a plate of cookies and glass of milk. "Hey you." Jocelyn said with a smile. She sat the cookies down then sat herself down next to her daughter.  
Clary looked at the sweets on the night stand then back at her mom. "What happened to my strict diet?"  
"You deserved a treat and I can see how upset you are." Clary put her head on her moms' shoulder.  
"Jace Lightwood invited me over today." Jocelyn seemed a little shocked.  
"Really? Well that's not too bad."  
"It's to go swimming and he is just going to laugh at me when he finds out I can't." Jocelyn looked at Clary square in the eye and smiled.  
"If he really likes you then he won't. You've had a crush on this boy forever, why can't you just tell him everything?"  
"He already knows I'm sick. I just am afraid if I get to close I'll hurt him." Clary looked to her lap and gripped her knees shutting her eyes tight.  
"What do you mean Clary?" Her mother knit her brows together and placed a hand on her daughters'.  
"I'm afraid if I fall in love, and have to leave earth, it will just be unbearable. I'm going to die by this disease, maybe not now but one day." Jocelyn gripped her hand and her expression softened.  
"Sweetie, everybody dies. But we have to work with the time we have left, and make the best of it. I could die tomorrow, or Luke, or Simon but if we live this life afraid we will never do what we want to do." Jocelyn kissed her daughter on the forehead and went downstairs. Clary smiled a bit at the door her mother left through and got up to get ready to go.  
~Jace  
When 8 o'clock finally rolled around Jace went outside to meet Clary. She had on short shorts a tank and he could just see her palm tree bathing suit beneath her clothing. Jace smiled and took her inside.  
"Your house is beautiful." As Jace was about to say something is family entered the room and his father spoke.  
"Not his, mine." Clary turned to the voice and grinned. She ran over and hugged Jaces' father like it was her own. It was weird to Jace at first but then he smiled at the two of them hugging.

"How're you feeling?" Robert asked smiling at Clary as they parted. She nodded, meaning she was okay. Jace could tell Izzy and Alec were confused with them hugging her father.  
"Wait, Clary you know our dad?" Izzy asked.  
"Yes, I'm a patient at the hospital." Clary blushed a little in how quickly she revealed her secret to Izzy and Alec. Isabelle's mouth dropped open and Alec was surprised.  
"But you s-still have your hair." Clary shook her head at what Izzy said. "Don't cancer patients lose their hair?" Clary nodded and removed her wig for them to see. Izzy nodded hesitantly, clearly not knowing what to think. She quickly put it back on and Jace touched the small of her back.

"Clary and I are going swimming, we'll see you shortly." Jace moved her swiftly to the pool after she waved a goodbye to them. 

The pool area was as simple as ever. It went to at least 8 feet had a white bottom. Clary set her stuff in a chair and sat down next to it. Jace removed his white tank top, showing his toned chest and wash board abs. Clary turned red and smirked to her lap. Jace threw his shirt off to the side and dived into the pool. He resurfaced just a minute later, with his wet golden curls dripping in his face. He pushed it back and smiled at her, staying in the same place.  
"What are you waiting for? Get in!" Clary shook her head. "The water is nice and warm, he floated on his back a little and swam to the edge in front of her, she shook her head once more.  
"You came here to swim. So swim." Clary looked at him and glanced to the water shaking her head more.  
"Alright, what's wrong?" He asked folding his arms on the ground above the pool and rested his head on it.  
"I umm, I can't…I can't swim." Jace burst out laughing and Clary cursed to herself. Her mother had been wrong. Clary started to get up to go but Jace stopped her.  
"Stop! Where are you going?"  
"Home." Clary answered bitterly.  
"Why?" Jace asked a little stumped.  
"Because what's the point of being here if I can't swim. And besides you're laughing at me." Clary said hugging her bag close to her.  
"I'm sorry, please stay." Clary weighed her options for a moment the n put her bag back down and looked at him. "Now get in here."  
"Did you not just hear me? I can't swim." She glared at him thinking he was mocking her but his expression was unrecognizable.  
"I know, I'm going to teach you." Clary looked at him like he had 6 heads. He gave her an amused look. "Come on!" Clary looked at him doubtful.  
"Jace…I can't." She sighed and he waved her over. Boy was he persistent. Clary got up, took off her shirt and pants, revealing her bikini and went to the water's edge. He swam back a little, just enough for a safe distance.  
"Now what?" Clary asked.  
"Jump." Clary shook her head fiercely.  
"Can't I just use the latter?" Jace shook his head and grinned. I sighed and looked at him impatiently.  
"I'll catch you, I promise." Clary bit her lip and looked at the water. She finally made the decision and jumped. She resurfaced quickly. "JACE!" She yelled splashing the water around her until she felt hands on her rib cage.  
"I got you." She rubbed her eyes of water then looked at him. He smiled at her. "Ready?" She nodded and he twirled her around then started telling her to do different things. "Kick with your feet." She did so and soon enough he let her swim but his hands never left her waist.  
"Lay on your back." She turned over and felt his hands move to her back. She looked at the ceiling and smirked as he moved her in a circle. She shut her eyes and reveled in his touch. This was peace, and he was her angel.

**AWH! It was so cute! Did you like?! Amazing huh? REVIEW PLEASE!  
Answer the question and you get part of the next chapter!  
Q: Do you want Clary to live or die? (first three people to answer get the excerpt) Thanks!!!**

**And a special thanks to my amazingly quick beta! BlondeHairBlueEyes14 You rock!!!**


	11. Chapter 10

**Hiya! What's up? YOU PEOPLE ARE AMAZING AT REVIEWS! No lie I had to go back a few pages to find the first three people. Lol keep it up!**

Clary and Jace soon got out of the pool when they both became all prunny. After Clary grabbed her wig from the pool (It had floated away when she jumped in the pool but neither of them bothered to get it or care.) She dried off then Jace directed her to a place she could change. Clary clutched her towel to her chest, grabbed her stuff then went into the bathroom. She changed into baggy sweat pants and a tank top. Granted it wasn't the most attractive thing in the world but she was comfortable. She shoved the rest of her stuff in her bag and put soaked wig back on. She then went back out to find Jace right outside the door, waiting for her. He was in standard jeans, a dark grey t-shirt, and a black hoodie. He gave her a smile as she exited the bathroom. She smiled back and blushed a little.  
"I think dinner is almost ready, want to eat?" Clary found it odd that they would be having dinner this late. It felt like 11 o'clock.  
"Isn't it a little late for dinner?" Jace took his phone out of his jeans and checked the time.  
"It's 9:00." An hour? They were only in there an hour? But Clary was so exhausted, her body ached and she just wanted to sleep. Cancer was a bitch sometimes. "So you want to eat?" Jace asked as she yawned. Truthfully Clary didn't want to eat, mainly because she didn't want to puke at his house, in his earshot. That would be plain embarrassing. Sure she did at Simon's but Jace was just different about the whole cancer thing. He didn't question it, or ask how she was feeling every 10 minutes, and she liked that. She felt like there was nothing wrong with her when she was around him, and it felt good.  
"Definitely." She nodded and Jace took her to the kitchen where the rest of the family was. To her surprise they were eating late too. "Why does your family eat at like 9:00?"  
"Well a couple days ago Maryse found this whole article about how Europeans eat late, and it helps you be healthy or something like that." Jace replied as he sat down beside her at the table.  
"But I thought you weren't supposed to eat passed eight." Izzy took her seat across from Clary.  
"You aren't but if it's healthy food then your okay. Mom is also on a vegetarian kick." Izzy pretended to gag and Clary giggled. Maryse came to the table setting interesting looking dishes on the table. Jace made a face causing Clary to giggle some more. Clary bowed her head to pray but stopped when she felt eyes on her.  
"What are you doing?" Jace asked and Clary rolled her eyes.  
"I'm the daughter of a preacher, what do you think I'm doing?"  
"Let's all pray together. How's that?" Robert suggested and everyone joined hands. Robert said a prayer followed by an Amen then looked at the food. One thing in particular drew Clary's eye.  
"What's that?" Clary pointed to the golden brown rectangular dish in the center of the table.  
"Easy cheesy spinach casserole." Boy, did it sound amazing. Clary took a spoonful of it and put it on her plate. The three Lightwood kids watched as she went to the asparagus and put some of it on there as well. Clary also grabbed what looked like meatloaf.

She filled her glass to the top with ice water and began to eat. An explosion of flavor came into her mouth. "Wow this is so yummy." Everything tasted so amazing to Clary but not everyone had the same opinion. Maryse, Robert, and Alec liked it but Izzy and Jace not so much.  
"How can you eat this stuff?" Clary finished chewing and tooka drink before she answered him.  
"Well, I'm always on a strict diet because of the whole cancer thing. And sometimes I can't even eat, because I feel like crap, so my mother blends dinner." The others grimaced at this. "So I'm used to the constant vegetables and everything." Jace nodded a bit.  
"Haven't you ever had pizza and all since you know?" Clary shrugged and took a drink.  
"Occasionally I can but it's not good for me at all, so I chose to lay off junk food and stuff."  
"Clary, the bathroom is down the hall if you need it later." Clary nodded thanks to Robert and he smiled. Clary enjoyed dinner with the Lightwoods. They chatted, laughed, and all together had a good time.

After dinner Clary did use the bathroom…quite a few times too. No one asked questions, they were probably aware of what she was doing in there. Jace lead Clary up to his room and she lay down on his bed but he was respectful and sat in a chair near his desk. Clary vaguely remembered what happened, or when she fell asleep but the next thing she knew Jace was shaking her gently.  
"Clary, wake up. Come on it's getting late." Clary's eyes fluttered open and her half conscious mind wasn't functioning the way it should have been, which caused her to say this.  
"Wow you are beautiful." Jace's eyes widened and she smiled at him sheepishly, closing her eyes. She heard a little laugh escape his lips and he picked her up and carried her downstairs. Clary fell asleep once more snuggling into Jaces' chest.

**~The Next Day~**

Clary awoke in her own bed the next day. All she remembered was she had been at the Lightwoods the night before and she had apparently fallen asleep. Clary looked at the clock which read 11:45. She about flung herself out of bed but stopped herself realizing it was Saturday, plus her muscles had something to say about it as well.  
"Mom!"She yelled lazily. One thing she did know is that she had to go to the hospital today. Jocelyn entered the room with Clary's breakfast. The smell of pancakes flooded her stomach and made her nauseous. Jocelyn set the tray on her desk and sat beside Clary.  
"Morning sleepy head." Clary laughed a little and her mother smiled.  
"What time do I have to go today?" Clary assumed Jocelyn knew what she meant, and she did.  
"4 and Simon called."  
"Is he feeling better?" Clary asked at the sudden mention of her best friend.  
"He is down to a cold." Clary sighed and wished Simon was completely healthy again. She missed him but she wasn't allowed to see him until he was over everything. Her body wasn't strong enough to fight off any type of infection right now and her mother made sure everything was completely clean and disinfected in the house. The kind of clean that drove Luke crazy, but he never said a thing. Now a day he was busy with church and he took up another job at the fish market to pay for Clary's treatment. Things were very tight with cash at home, something that made Clary feel extremely guilty. They had taken a second mortgage on the house the first time around and she overheard her mother talking about getting a loan. All Clary knew is that they would be in huge debt and Clary may not be even able to go to college. "You alright today?"  
"No, I'm sore and I feel like crap."  
"We can go to the hospital early if you would like. You can help out in the play area." Clary smiled a little at this. She loved playing with the littler kids in the play room. They had tons of toys and she made new friends every time she went in there. She swung her legs over the bed and smiled at her mom."I would absolutely love to go." Clary realized she wasn't wearing her wig and looked around the room for it.  
"On the stand in the bathroom." Jocelyn said knowing what Clary was wanting and then started getting up. "I'll be downstairs whenever you're ready to go."  
The small red headed teen nodded and went to shower. She undressed then turned on the water. She slipped into the shower, letting the warm water sooth her aching muscles as it fell upon her. Soon she started to wash herself, and then after she was finished she got out and dressed. She threw on dark jeans, a blue blouse and converse. She fixed her rat's nest of a wig after washing the chlorine out and drying it.  
Once her hair was fixed she went downstairs to where her mother was waiting. After Clary grabbed her phone off the dining room table they were off to the hospital.

When they arrived Clary immediately went to the children's wing while her mother went to the cafeteria. Clary had at least an hour to do whatever she wanted and she wanted this. She rounded the corner and ran into a familiar blonde. Someone she least expected to see here. Jace.  
"Hey." He smiled at her then his brows furrowed. "What?" Her expression matched like someone that had seen a comet hit earth right in front of them.  
"Nothing I just didn't expect to see you here. What are you doing here anyway?"  
"I'm helping my dad out." Clary noticed he was carrying a bag of chemo in his hand and she gave an amused look.  
"I can see that. Do you even know how to give a patient that?"Jace shook his head back and forth.  
"I thought the kid could show me how. Robert explained it but I don't remember." Clary rolled her eyes and grabbed the clipboard in his hand.  
"Madeline Thomas. I know her, she's 10. She barely pays any attention to what they do to her so you'll definitely need help." Clary checked the room number and lead Jace to it. Guess the play room will have to wait another day.

As they entered the room Maddy was seated on a bed and playing Pokémon. She looked up when they entered and ran to Clary. "Clary! I missed you." She hugged Clary tight then looked at Jace then to Clary. "Oh, I get it. He's your boyfriend isn't he?" Clary blushed and laughed uneasily. Truth was Clary couldn't answer that. She didn't know what she and Jace were. Were they friends? Acquaintances? It was something she noted they would have to work out in the future. But as for now, Maddy was the important one.  
"I tell you about it some other time." She whispered into Maddy's ear and she giggled. Clary took the chemo bag from Jace and Maddy sat back on the bed. Clary grabbed the hook and nodded to Maddy's mother. The red head attached the bag to the hook and Maddy gave her her VAD. Clary unscrewed the cap then attached it to the chemo bag tube. Perfect. She handed Maddy her bed pan and smiled.  
"Are you staying?" Maddy asked growing pale.  
"No I have to go get treatment myself today, but I'll see you later okay?" Maddy grinned and Clary and Jace left the room.

"She is a bubbly one." Jace breathed once they escaped the room. Clary gave him a sly smile and continued to walk. "So um…"  
"Yes?" Clary asked glancing at him.  
"What are we exactly?" Clary froze in place and turned towards him as he stopped to.  
"I don't know. Friends I guess." Jace met Clary's gaze and she about melted.  
"I don't want to be just friends you know." Clarys' mouth gaped and her eyes widened. "I want to be more." He intertwined his fingers with hers loosely. Clary turned away to face the wall to her left, pulling her hand with her.  
"No. We can't." She felt Jace touch her waist, she flinched, and he pulled his hand away..  
"Why not?" His voice was coarse with what sounded to Clary as anger and sadness, which confused her greatly. She didn't want to look at his face, she didn't need to. She could picture his expression in her mind, and that was enough to send chills down her spine. "Because I have…"The last word's seemed to choke in her throat and her chest tightened. An odd sensation of sadness and recognition spread through her body. She had wanted to say cancer, but she couldn't tell him.

He already knew, but she wanted him to hear it from her. But Clary just couldn't say it, and for the first time in a long time, she was….terrified. Not of Jace, or the word, but of leaving Jace. It felt to her if she said those words, she would leave him forever. And one day she knew she would. The crushing truth was Clary may never survive to graduate high school, get her license, first car, get married, or have children. But she never worried about those things, this whole time she realized she would be leaving Jace. It would hurt him, if they loved, and lost. Of course a voice in Clary kept repeating he already loves you.  
"Cancer? Is that the word." Clary nodded and Jace turned her to face him.  
"I don't care."  
"But I could…die."  
"I don't want to think about that. I want to think about right now. I really really like you." Clary shook her head once more.  
"We can't, I'm sorry. I'm really am. I don't want to hurt you." Clary ran down the hall to her room, leaving Jace standing alone. And the only thought running through Clary's mind was…

_Whatever you do, don't turn around._

**TADA! Tehe XD I love it! Would you think? REVIEW please.**

**So people, here is your question for your preview!**

**Q: What chapter do you think Clary and Jace will kiss???**


	12. Chapter 11

**Going to the doctor sometime next week to get a stupid tupid HPV shot! :P I hate it, and it's not just one its 3. Grr can't wait to move out of the house. But I get to see if I can be a donor for bone marrow of course I have to have parental consent, so my mom is good for something XD jk. Here is your next chapter.**

Clary continued down the hall until she ran into Robert. She stepped back and muttered an apology, although it was engulfed with sobs which made it barely audible. "What's wrong Clary?" She looked up at the familiar voice, face streaming with tears, eyes bloodshot, and face red and puffy. She threw her arms around him and he hugged back. Clary needed a father figure right now, and Robert was second best to Luke.  
"It's alright Clary." Clary nodded and after a few minutes of sobs and comfort, Clary stepped back. She wiped the tears away from her eyes, letting out a little laugh.  
"Sorry Robert, I just…I had…I'm okay." She finally said giving up on trying to explain things.  
"You sure?" Clary nodded. "As long as your sure." Robert smiled and Clary did the same back. "Anyways why are you here so early, your appointment isn't until later."  
"I wanted to see the kids, but I got side tracked. I had to help Jace with Maddie." Clary breathed out the end of the sentence with a voice filled with heart ache. She wanted Jace, and he wanted her, but she couldn't seem to just be with him already. If her cancer hadn't come back she would have definitely went out with him, but now that it was back it would be difficult for both of them if things went sour. Jace was her salvation, even though he didn't do much for her except breathe. Sometimes he was an asshat with a douchebaggyness personality, but that didn't matter to Clary. He more handsome than an angel, this she was sure of. She definitely loved him, but love had to wait. She was snapped out of her daze by the man in front of her. "Clary?"  
"Huh?" She asked shaking Jace from her mind.  
"I said would you like to do treatment now? I'm free." Clary nodded and followed Robert. They entered the white room, with a bed in the center. It was a standard hospital bed except with a SpongeBob pillow that lay at the top and a blue comforter. She liked how each room was customized; it gave a home feeling, especially to those who couldn't go home. Clary sat herself on the bed, when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. She pulled it from her jeans as Robert went to get her IV bag of chemo. It was Preston, or Living_Strong123, as she had come to know him on the internet. She met him last year at the walk for cancer patients. His mother was carrying potato salad to the buffet tent and Clary about knocked her over. Luckily Travis was there to brace the impact for his mom, so she ended up knocking him over instead. After several apologies, they chatted and spent most of their time at the walk together. He was a great guy and was very excellent at cheering her up. Although she hadn't talked to him in forever, something that she regretted. She had just been so busy with everything that she hadn't had time.  
(Preston bold/Clary Italics)  
**Hey what are you up to?**  
_In the hospital, you?_  
**Same.**  
_What?? Why??_  
**I told you this already. My cancer is back.  
**_You didn't tell me that._ Clary was extremely confused it had been at least a month since she had talked to him. Maybe his chemo was getting to him.  
**Yeah I did. Silly Clary, it was the same time you were in the hospital. **Clary didn't reply for a minute, thousands of things were going through her head. She had never told Preston she had cancer again. This she was completely sure of, but if she didn't, how did he know? He didn't have Simon's number or her parents.  
_How did you find out?_  
**What? You told me over IM.** There was only one explanation, Jace. Jace had gotten on her computer at work when she forgot to turn it off. She cursed inwardly and she heard Robert enter once more.  
"Robert."  
"Hmm?" He asked getting everything together for her treatment.  
"How did Jace find out about my cancer?" He stopped and looked at me square in the eye and shrugged.  
"He probably found your file when I gave him paperwork to put away." This surprised Clary greatly, maybe she actually did tell Preston.  
_I gotta go Preston. Chemo._

Robert grabbed her VAD and looked the long IV tube to it. He turned his back to her grabbing her bed pan and handing it to her. Clary sent a quick text to her mom about where she was and slipped over her shoes and flipping on the tv. "You need anything else Clary, you know what to do." Robert said before leaving the room. The only sound that remained in the room was voices on television. She continuously flipped through channels before settling on a rerun of Gossip Girl. She watched as the chemo went in…and out, of her system. After a while she heard the door open and a familiar blonde poked his head in. The red head knew full well what she probably looked liked, which made her pale, drained face go red.  
~Jace~  
"Hey." Jace said slipping in the room completely. He stared at her for a moment a bit put off by her ghost white face and dark circles under her eyes. He had never seen what a cancer patient had to go through to actually feel healthy once more, until now, that is.  
"Hey…" She spoke weakly, as though she hadn't slept in days. Jace was afraid to step any closer to her. He wasn't sure if she wanted him there right now, especially since she looked liked she did. He knew most girls were obsessed about what they looked like in front of guys. But then again Clary wasn't most girls. "You can come in. Cancer isn't contagious." Jace didn't know whether if he should laugh or not. Probably not. He came over, grabbing a chair from the corner of the room and scooting it up beside the bed she was sitting on.

"I wanted to talk to you about-"  
"Us?"  
"No, well yes, but I mean-"  
"Look Jace it's sweet that you like me and all but I can't be with you right now. Can you wait until I'm in remission again?" Jace shook his head. He couldn't wait that long, besides she may never go back into remission.  
"Then I guess there is nothing I can do because, I don't want anyone more hurt than they have to be."  
"What are you talking about?"  
"I'm talking about if something were to go wrong. I thought we already went through this Jace. Look, not right now okay?"  
"I'm still not getting the real reason." Clary barfed into the pick bed pan she held in her hands. Jace nearly vomited himself, by watching her.  
"That reason enough?" She wiped her mouth on her hand Jace was silent. "Do you really want to sit by me and watch me vomit all the time? Watch me become weak in front of your eyes knowing you can't control anything that is happening? Jace I'm just trying to protect you." Jace got up into her face immediately, leaving them inches apart.  
"I don't need your protection." Clary's eyes widened at his closeness and Jace grinned a bit. Clary felt Jace's warm breath hit her face and she suddenly felt self conscious of her own, which probably smelled of puke. Jace touched under her cheek and smiled. He didn't care about if she smelled of puke or not, he wanted to prove that he wanted her in whatever state she was in. He leaned a bit closer and Clary's breath caught in her throat. Jace's gold eyes never left hers, as he kept closing the gap between them. Jace lips touched hers, it wasn't a kiss but he would soon change that. Just as soon as he was about to sweep her into a kiss the door came open and Clary pulled away. Damn it, Jace scowled in his head as an older version of Clary entered the room.

"Hey mom." Clary smiled at the woman with dark red hair who stood at the doorway. What did Jace have to do to get one bloody kiss from the girl he liked? Jace noticed his hands were on both sides of Clarys' legs and he was leaning near her like he was ready to pounce on Clary. Which he had to admit he would have if Jocelyn hadn't interrupted. Jace immediately moved from Clary and back to the chair at the side of the chair.

~Clary~

Clary needed to know what her mother was thinking. It was killing her not to know. She saw the surprise plastered on her mother's face once she entered the room. But she still couldn't tell what her mother thought of it truly. Did she think Jace and her were together? And if she did would she approve? Any other person that came in here would assume Jace and she were together, but they weren't, were they? Clary had been so close to tasting Jace, so close to feeling his warm, wet, soft lips on hers. When he leaned into her, her mind became foggy and she felt like she was drugged up. His smell, his face, everything about Jace consumed her completely, making her want things, that let's just say a preachers daughter shouldn't be thinking about. Her mother stood by the door now, her face unreadable along with her precious thoughts.  
"Hey honey, what's going on?"  
"Oh Jace and I were just talking." Jocelyn's brows arched at the teens and set the steaming hot coffee in her hand, on the sink area.  
"May I ask what about?"  
"School." Clary said nonchalantly trying to get off the subject. She looked to Jace who had an amused look on his face. Clary rolled her eyes, not believing he was actually enjoying this.  
"Speaking of which, how is school for you Jace?" This snapped Jace from his gaze on Clary and caused him look at Jocelyn.  
"It's alright I guess. I wanted to ask you something actually." Clarys' eye widened and she gave Jace a what-are-you-up-to look. Jocelyn took a sip of her coffee just as Jace said the next set of words. "May I take Clary on a date?" Clary mouth dropped open as she stared at Jace. She couldn't believe he would actually ask that, for goodness sake, he hadn't even asked her! Clary continued to stare but only for a moment before she heard Jocelyn nearly choke on her coffee. Her mother started coughing and patting her chest, once she collected herself she looked at Jace.  
"We don't really want Clary dating." With these words Jace looked like he had just been smacked in the face.  
"Please…I really would enjoy accompanying your daughter to dinner tomorrow night." Who was this clown, Clary asked herself, referring to Jace. Clary looked at Jocelyn who stared at Jace for a long while.  
"Alright,it's okay with me if it is okay with Clary." Jace looked to Clary with a grin.  
"Well…" Clary egged him to ask her out.  
"Well what?"  
"Are you going to do it the right way?"  
"Oh right." Jace rolled his eyes up to the ceiling and put his hand under his chin, in thought. He snapped when an idea popped into his head and got down on one knee. "Clary Fray, I like you a-"Clary pushed on his shoulder playfully. She laughed a little and rolled her eyes.  
"This isn't a proposal for marriage Jace. Just ask me out already."  
"Clary, will you have dinner with me at 7 tomorrow night?" Clary blushed a tad and smiled. She didn't know what to say. If she said yes, she would be going against everything she had thought about in the last couple days. On the other hand, if she said no, then it would kill her. Clary has ahd a crush on him forever…she had been waiting for this. Then it dawned on her, she was letting her disease dictate her entire existence, and there is no way she would do that anymore.  
"Sure. Where we going?" He opened his mouth to say something then shut it instantly. He waited a few moments before he spoke again.  
"I'll get back to you." Jace stood and opened his phone, dialing in numbers. Clary yawned and snuggled in under the blue comforter, in the warm cozy bed and slept.

~Date Night~  
Clary found herself throwing on a light tint of make-up while she examined her reflection in the bathroom mirror. Her hair was straight, letting only a few tamed curls dance around her head and she had on the standard little black dress as Simon called it. It had spaghetti straps and it was A-line so it flowed out when it reached the bottom. Simon had called her gorgeous in it because it showed off her fiery wig. He didn't seem tio happy about Clary going on the date but he wanted her happy and if this did it, he would have to deal. Clary set the blush in her hand back down on the sink and looked at herself once more. She smiled in approval then went to find her strappy shoes. 

Clary went to her closet and opened the white doors. Luckily, Clary didn't have to search too far. She immediately found her shoes neatly displayed on the floor below under her many brightly colored clothing. She slipped them on and heard her mother call her.  
"Clary! Jace is here!" Clary checked herself in the mirror one more time and went downstairs. As she approached the bottom of the stairs, she felt her heart drop to her stomach and her stomach hit her feet. This was her first real date and she couldn't help but feel butterflies. She came down the stairs feeling like she was sweating like a pig. She looked around to find Jace and her parents talking in hushed tones about curfews and plans for their date. Clary didn't want to know just yet where they were going or doing so she blocked it out. She cleared her throat and everyone looked to her as she reached the bottom step.  
"You look beautiful Clary." Her mother had tears in her eyes when she said this. "Let me go get the camera, don't you two go anywhere." Clary groaned loudly as her mother scurried off. The petite red head went to her date and started tugging on his arm.  
"Quick before she comes back." Luke gave Clary a disapproving look and Clary stopped dead in her tracks. "I mean I would love to take pictures." Clary flashed him a fake smile but his expression remained. "What Luke?"  
"You don't expect me to let you leave like that?" Clary was dumbfounded for a minute and then she realized what it was he meant.  
"Oh right, sorry I forgot." Luke grabbed her plain white sweater jacket off the dining room chair. Clary slipped it on with Jace's help. Once it was on, she untucked her hair from the sweater and looked at Jace.  
"Ready?" He asked as he stared at her like a blind man seeing the sky for the first time. She was just about to answer when her mother came in with the digital camera.  
"Don't go anywhere yet." Her mother grabbed Jace's arm and put it around Clarys' waist, and turned Clary so that her back was against his front side.  
"This isn't prom mother!" Clary snapped at her as she moved a few feet from them.  
"Just smile." Jocelyn turned on the camera and snapped a couple shots. Clary tried to hide her annoyance with a smile but she would bet anything she had been glaring by the 10th one.

After the dreaded picture taking was over, they said their goodbyes, and Clary was whisked away by Jace. When they reached the car he opened the door for her, shut it, and then went to his side. Clary clicked her seat belt as Jace jump in the car. It was a silent drive as they made their way to their dinner destination but neither cared because it was comfortable. They didn't need to speak to be together, they said everything without speaking. When they arrived at what looked to be a very expensive restaurant, Clary gapped at how beautiful everything was. It had an outside romantic feel to it. There were candles that decorated the tables, along with underwater roses, and a satin table cloth. There was a dance floor in the center so any table could look upon it and everything was surrounded by candles or the twinkling icicle lights you use at Christmas. Clary was in pure awe as they sat down at their table. The hostesses that guided them to their tables set their menus down and left them.  
"Wow Lightwood, you have really out done yourself." Clary looked around the place once more to find an older couple about 80 a couple tables down. They were smiling, laughing, and giving each other tiny kisses. To anyone else it would have been whatever but to Clary, it was beautiful. She smiled in that direction and Jace looked to where she was.  
"Amazing isn't it?"  
"They are just an old couple Clary." Jace said looking back down at his menu, which Clary had yet to pick hers up. "It's not that amazing, you see them all the time."  
"It is amazing Jace. Could you imagine how long they have probably been together? Maybe their whole lives even. I wish I could have something like them someday with someone." Jace looked at her with a smile.  
"No doubt in my mind you will."  
"No, I probably won't. One day my cancer will come back and I'll be too weak to fight back." Jace's brows knit together and nothing more was said until the waitress came over. Clary noticed the blonde waitress practically drooled over Jace the entire time.  
"Hi, I'm Bridget and I'll be your server this evening, what can I get you to drink?"  
"Ice Tea please." Jace said then Bridget looked to Clary.  
"Water without lemon."  
"Okay, I'll be right back." Bridget left and Clary looked at Jace again, then to her menu. She opened it and her mouth about hit the floor. The prices on it were through the roof.  
"Can you afford this?" Clary asked looking up with wide eyes.  
"Pick anything you want." Jace smiled and Clary nodded unsure.  
After Bridget came back with their drinks and they ordered their food Clary looked at the dance floor longingly. Jace pretended as if her didn't see, but it was killing him that he wasn't making her happy.  
"Wanna dance?" Clary brightened when he asked and he led her to the dance floor. When they reached it, Jace put his hands on her waist as she wrapped her arms around her neck. They began to sway a bit, but the barely moved and Clary started to giggle.  
"Nervous?"  
"No, I just can't dance very well."  
"I was sure dancing would qualify on the list." Jace laughed a bit.  
"What list?" He asked.  
"The list that Jace can do anything."  
"I don't know about everything, most things yeah, but everything, not so much."  
"Well you're dancing right now aren't you?"  
"Yeah I guess." Clary smiled as the song ended. They clapped for the band playing and made their way back to their table, just in time for their food to arrive. Jace pulled her chair out and she sat gracefully.

After they ate and paid, Jace and Clary walked to the car in the brisk night of spring. He helped her in, and then they were off. Clary noticed on the drive none of the surroundings looked familiar.  
"Where are we going Jace?" He was silent the only thing he did was smile. "Seriously Jace, where are you taking me?"  
"You'll see." 

10 mintues later Clary found herself standing on a sandy bank while the waves washed up against her shoeless feet. Clary squealed out from the pure coldness of it all. She heard Jace laughing from behind her and she immediately ran towards him. When she reached the spot where he was sitting she tackled him, laughing. His back hit the sand and Clary lay on top of him. They looked at each other for a long while without ever moving. It was like they were the only two people on the planet.  
"Jace…" Clary squeaked out to him for no particular reason. Jace tucked one of her red locks behind her ear and gave her his signature smile. At that moment all Clary needed to know was whether this was real or not, and that it wasn't a dream or her imagination. But more importantly, she needed to know _he_ was real. She suddenly felt her stomach twisting and her palms begin to sweat as she leaned down towards him. She bent her neck a little so they wouldn't bump noses and her eyes closed as their foreheads touched slightly. Only millimeters from having her first kiss, Clary felt her heart beating in her ears, and the blood rushing to her head. She froze when their lips only touched. She was too nervous to close the gap between them, but Jace had no problem doing it for her. Their lips brushed against each others, it was barely a kiss at all but Clary felt an electric current go down the whole of her body. Jace must have felt it to because the gap closed once more and instead of the gentle kiss they had the first time, things became more urgent and passionate.

His mouth moved against hers without ever stopping. She drew her hands up from resting on his chest to twisting in his golden locks. His hands moved up to the back of her neck and she felt him push a little on the back of her head. It wasn't forceful but it made her feel safe and wanted. The kiss was more than Clary had expected. His lips were warm and soft but somehow they molded just right to Clary's mouth, like they had belonged there for their entire life. After a few moments she felt like she needed more from the kiss, so she opened for him. Jace immediately took the opportunity to assault her mouth and it felt fantastic (let's just say it doesn't belong in the bible.) After a while they finally broke for air, and for once Clary felt like a normal teenage girl and not someone with a disease.

**WOW that took FOREVER! I've been trying to update like all week, no lie. LOL Anyways what did you think? Love it? Hate it? REVIEW!**

**Q: What day do amusement parks open for the public??? **

**It may have something to do with the story, but the reason I'm asking is because I really want to go to one like KENNYWOOD!! :D **


	13. Chapter 12

**I'm mad because I lost my JACE NECKLACE!!! GAH! I was so pissed! But mom said she would buy me a new one!! YAY! ****J**

Monday at school Clarys heart pounded in her ear drums and she started to sweat nervously. Her head was flooded with questions. She and Jace had returned from their date, after their romantic kiss on the beach, and said goodbye. They texted all weekend and he had called her every morning to say hello and every night to say sweet dreams. He was really corny, Clary had to admit, but she loved it. But now here she was nervous as hell because of a lot of different reasons. Reason 1 was because she didn't know if Jace would want to be seen with her at school. Reason 2 was because she had a huge report due and she was nervous about presenting it. As for reason 3…well that was…complicated.

After she returned from her date with Jace, Jocelyn and Luke had a serious discussion with her. It wasn't about sex, as Clary had anticipated when they said "we need to talk." They wanted to discuss the whole idea of Clary having a boyfriend in her…situation. They wanted to make sure Jace could handle the whole leukemia thing, and when they asked, Clary couldn't answer. She wasn't sure if he was mentally prepared for the ride. Clary herself wasn't always prepared for what was happening to her. She especially wanted to know what her cell counts were, which was the last, and most important reason of why she was freaking out today. She sighed heavily as she made her way across the lawn towards Jaces' group. Would he stick up for her? Or would he ignore her? God she hoped it was the first one.

Clary stopped by a nearby oak tree and searched for the boy with golden curls among the group. But to her surprise she didn't see him at all. She scanned the school grounds from the oak tree and nope. Nothing. Clary sighed heavily and looked to the wet grass under her beat up converse. She hoped Jace would be there but she would just have to wait until tomorrow. Clary started off to the large crowd of students gathered around the front steps to the school building when she felt something grab her hand. She whipped her head to the right to see a familiar blonde. A smile effortlessly decorated her face as she looked at his tousled mess of curls and beautiful golden eyes.  
"Hey." Hic silky voice made her almost turn to goo all over the lawn.  
"Hey, I looked for you. I thought you would be with your friends." He shrugged nonchalantly and intertwined their fingers.

"I thought a change of pace might be nice." Clary nodded, accepting the answer but her head couldn't seem to stop asking why. "Let's get to class."

Jace started to lead her through the swarm of people and along the way they picked up tons of stares. Some people watched and whispered, and others just stared. Clary suddenly was starting to feel very self conscious. She hated people staring at her. She felt as if the walls closed in around her and she didn't like it. She always felt like she was being suffocated, it was hard to explain but she just felt trapped. Jace seemed unaffected by the eyes. He just kept walking and pretended not to notice whatsoever. As they walked as his group of friends, there were mixes of facial expressions. Izzy was smiling along with Maia, Alec, and Magnus. Sebastian however looked like he had been slapped in the face and Aline looked jealous as hell.

Clary squeezed Jaces' hand looking for some sign of reassurance and sure enough he squeezed back. They made their way up the steps and into the school building with a new ort of confidence. They were getting the same looks as they had outside but they really didn't seem to notice as much. He walked her to her locker and she released his hand to twist in the combination.

"So how was your day yesterday?"

"I was with you for most of it Jace."

"I know, so it was awesome." Clary rolled her eyes and hit him on the shoulder lightly. She didn't really have the energy to be mean today. She was exhausted and extremely stressed.

"Yeah it was." Clary smiled a little as she collected her books. Jaces' brows knitted and he touched her cheek lightly.  
"What's wrong? Did I do something? Ugh, don't tell me it was because everyone was staring at you. Listen Clary, I don't care wh-"

"It's not that Jace. I'm just worried that's all." Clary shut her locker and turned to face him. He seemed utterly confused. Clary heaved a sigh and rested her back up against her locker.

"What's going on? My dad said you had an appointment with him to check on your cancer cells or whatever." Something clicked in Jaces' mind and he was immediately in front of her cupping her face and looking at her with anxious eyes. "You need to tell me right now. What the hell is going on with your leukemia?" Clary shushed him to be quieter about the whole cancer thing. He obliged but still looked in her with questionable eyes.

"What. Is. Going. On?"

"Honestly Jace, I have no idea. Robert drew blood but his team couldn't test it until later today. I want to say everything is okay but I can't." Jace nodded with a certain understanding. Clary could tell he didn't know what to say or do, and how much it was frustrating him. "I have to make sure you can handle this Jace. I mean can you? Leukemia is well a rollercoaster. It's hard sometimes to deal with certain news or be prepared for things. Everything is so unexpected and some people can't handle the surprises. I just need to know if you can deal with all this." Jace was quiet for a long while making Clary's heart sink in her chest. Eventually though, he spoke.

"I don't know what to say. I've never been with a girl with cancer, and I don't know how to deal with things. I want to help you but I'm help_less._ I wish I could do the things my dad could do, at least feel I've helped a little, but I can't. I'll handle it all as best I can, promise." 

Clary hugged him tight and Jace froze slightly but then hugged back. Clary wasn't hugging for the simple fact to or because Jace told her he'll try. She hugged him because he had told her how helpless he felt, and at the same exact time he said it Clary knew what the definition of cancer was. Helplessness, anger, and fear. Jace pulled back a little and kissed Clary's forehead lightly, and her face lit up immediately. "Thank you." Clary whispered when she met his eyes again.

"For what?"

"For being here for me."

"Anytime." Jace smiled and they headed off to class as the bell rang.

In English class, Clary definitely wasn't herself. She felt more exhausted than ever and she was slipping in and out of dreamland, as she put it. Thankfully Isabelle kept waking her up so she wouldn't get in trouble.

"Clary, are you alright?" Izzy asked as she felt Clary's forehead. "You have a bit of a fever. Maybe I should take you home." Clary shook her head, but yet she knew she should go home or to the hospital.

"I'm fine Izzy, just kind of tired." Isabelle nodded and looked to the nerdy kid at the front presenting his book report. He had curly brown hair, glasses, and wore his pants a little too high. He was a nice kid but very odd. He chose one of the Lord of the Rings books, which seemed to be boring most of the kids in her class. After he finished he handed in his report and sat back down. Our teacher Mr. Colistra seemed to be happier than ever about it, he even clapped when no one else did. He took the kids report then scrolled down the roll sheet.

"Clary Fray." Clary snapped to attention and grabbed a neatly printed two page book report. She chose the book Beastly. She definitely thought she did an excellent job working on it, especially since she had to fight to keep her eyes open to even read the book. Clary started her report, trying to focus on the paper in front of her but the room felt like it was spinning. She continued to read on adding an um or uh between 2 or 3 words. The corners of her vision started to blur and Clary knew something was wrong. She had never experienced this before.

"Mr. Colistra may uhh I be excused?" That's when Clary couldn't handle the dizziness anymore. Everything around her lost its recognition and all Clary saw was darkness as she hit the floor.

Clary slipped in and out of consciousness. She saw blurry imagines and heard people yelling her name but nothing registered in her mind. She would be awake a couple seconds then out the next. Her mind just wouldn't let her stay up. It wanted to go to sleep, and a little voice inside of her told her it wanted to sleep forever.

"Can you hear me?" Clary couldn't recognize the voice, but it sounded urgent. Clary wanted to open her eyes to see the face of the stranger, but she didn't have to. "What's her name?" The voice spoke again and Clary waited for another voice to answer.

"Clary. Her name is Clary." Jace. He spoke with a type of voice that Clary couldn't place. It was filled with such a heavy sadness. She wanted to tell him it was okay but she couldn't, she wouldn't. The stranger spoke again as she felt she was being lifted into something.

"Clary can you hear me? Can you open your eyes?" She refused to open her eyes. All she wanted to do was sleep, why couldn't they understand that? She soon felt a glove material on her eyelid and it being forced upward. A bright light was shined in her eye and she flinched slightly. The stranger shut her eyelid and never lifted it again. Clary went back to black darkness that was calling to her.

**GAH! Thought it would be longer but I've had a lot of things on my mind. My friend Jessica got engaged on Saturday, YAY!! But unfortunately its short lived joy bc her fiancée has to go to Iraq Wednesday : He is a pretty good friend of mine so its depressing for me too. Anyways REVIEW!**

**Excerpt question: **

**What do you think is wrong with Clary??**


	14. Chapter 13

**Yeah its short but I'm trying to keep things dramatic lol Anyways here is the next chapter!**

**JPOV  
**Jace ended up outside by the ambulance, more scared than ever. He had been in Algebra 2 when his sister texted him saying 'something is wrong with Clary'. He promptly got up and ran from the classroom ignoring his teachers' protesting. He saw to guys in uniform rushing a girl with fiery hair down the hallway. They were giving her oxygen and telling her to open her eyes. She didn't. He joined Isabelle, who had been trailing behind them, and then quickly followed them out into the parking lot.

At this point Jace could see teachers and students alike looking out various windows that lined along the brick structured building of the school. But Jace didn't focus on them, just Clary. They kept asking her to open her eyes but she wouldn't. What was going on? What was wrong with Clary? Jaces' mind was racing at a hundred miles a minute. He thought about everything that Clary had said to him this morning, trying to figure out what caused her to faint. Then it hit him like a train crashing in his brain. It was what she said about her cell counts. She was nervous about finding them out. Then Jace froze in place. If it was her cancer, then this became even more of an emergency. The world seemed to move in slow motion but Jace managed to tell the paramedics her name.

"What's her name?"

"Clary. Her name is Clary." He watched them as they asked once more to open her eyes. They finally opened them for her. Her eye balls moved around, so she wasn't unconscious, but then why didn't she open her eyes before? Everything seemed to get on his nerves now. He was very on edge about Clary. He needed the paramedics to tell him something, anything. But what did he get? Nothing. One paramedic got out of the ambulance and into the drivers seat. THe other stayed behind and started to shut the door when Jace stopped him.

"Can I ride with her?" The middle aged man looked him over once and nodded. Jace handed his keys off to Isabelle.

"Come by after school if you want. I'll have them take her to dad." Izzy nodded furiously as Jace got in the ambulance. The paramedic shut the doors and they started to drive, and pretty fast too. The guy that was driving of course, turned on the siren and lights so they could get through traffic. Jace had always wanted to ride in an ambulance, but for fun, not like this. Jace grabbed Clary's hand and the paramedic looked at them.

"What is she to you?" The man asked but his voice was sympathetic and full of care.

"She's my girlfriend." Jace said softly as he looked at Clary. "Can you take us to St. Idris?"

THe guy driving snapped to attention and glanced in the review mirror periodically.

"? That's not an ordinary hospital." The guy laughed a little and Jaces' angered bubbled up. Why the hell was he laughing?

"I know my father works there. He can help her."

"You think its cancer?" The other paramedic asked with a serious look on his face. At least he didn't take it as a joke.

"I don't think, I know. She is a cancer patient already and going through treatment. She needs to go where people can actually help her." The ambulance was silent and the guy in the front nodded and turned down the road to St. Idris.

As they entered the hospital there was quite a bit of panic among the staff. No one knew what was going on or why there had been an ambulance out front. Usually people with a cancer issue are taken to the normal hospital first and later transferred, but Jace didn't want to waste time. The paramedics wheeled Clary in on the stretcher and the nurse behind the front desk immediately stood.

"What's going on?" Her face was full of recognition when Jace stopped in front of the desk.

"Clary needs help. She fainted in class and she-"She didn't need for Jace to continue. She picked up the intercom phone and called Robert. Jace sighed in relief as his father suddenly rounded the corner. Jace gave a brief explanation to what happened and Robert almost instantly told the paramedics to follow him. Jace, of course, trailed behind.

His father led them into a big open private room, grabbing a couple staff along the way. The paramedics had no problem lifting Clary off the stretcher by themselves; but what was scaring Jace was the fact that Clary wasn't moving. Robert thanked the paramedics and they exited the room. Jace went to the corner of the room and started to pull a chair over when his father put a hand on his shoulder. Jace looked at him, not able to read his expression.

"Jace, I would like you to wait outside." Jace almost yelled at his father. He couldn't believe he would tell him to wait outside. "It would really help me concentrate on figure out what's wrong with Clary." Something in his face told Jace that he knew exactly what was wrong but he didn't want to say anything. Jace could do nothing but nod and exit the room at that moment. He saw a nurse exit a few minutes after him, probably going to call Clary's parents, he thought as he sat on a chair outside her room. The large door was shut and Jace could hear nothing of what was going on behind it.

He sat there for what must have been 45 minutes before he saw Luke and Jocelyn approach him. Luke's expression was that of concern and determination, while Jocelyn's was more of panic and fear. They rushed to him and Jace stood to attention.

"Is she in there? Can I see her?" Jocelyn had a rushed raspy voice. She feared for what was wrong with her daughter and no doubt looked did as well. Jace soon realized this must be the first time Clary ever had a real issue with leukemia.

"She is in there. But Robert doesn't want anyone to see her yet, he is still in there." Jocelyn nodded and sat down in Jaces' chair. He let her, knowing that she needed it more than he did.  
No one said anything after a few long minutes. Jocelyn looked as if she as in her own haze and Luke looked as if he was contemplating something. They never let go of each others' hands though, and they seemed calm. Jace didn't know how, he was going crazy. He kept pacing in front of the door as others went in and out, and chewed on his thumb nail like a rabbit munching on a carrot. Finally everyone seemed to clear out of the room, and his father came into view.

"Jace you may go in and see her now. I have to talk to Luke and Jocelyn for a moment." Robert had a sad look on his face. One that told Jace something was really wrong with Clary.

"Does Clary know what's wrong with her?" Jaces' voice was barely a whisper but Robert gave a slight nod and Jace went through the door and on the other side was a tiny red headed girl. Clary. He walked over to her with a small smile on his face. No matter what state she was in he was happy to she her. Her wig had been put back on, which he figured was Roberts' doing. He pulled a chair over and sat down on its comfy surface. Clary must of heard the loud noise of wood on the tiled floor because her eyes fluttered open.

"Hey…" She said catching Jaces' attention. He grabbed her fragile hand that lay next to her and traced circles on it with his thumb.

"Hey Clary, I'm sorry I woke you." She shook her head and to Jace it meant he didn't.

"You didn't I was already awake." She held a certain sadness in her eyes and he saw a tear fall from the corner of her eye. He wiped it away immediately with his thumb and knitted his brow.

"What is it?" Clary looked to the door almost as if she was avoiding the question or avoiding his future reaction.

"My mom and dad here?" She looked to him again a bit hopeful and he nodded.

"Clary tell me what's wrong." That is where she broke down completely. She began to sob and grabbed at his shirt with a yearning to be held. It shocked Jace and it was definitely confusing for him, but he hugged her close and told her everything would be okay. And that he was here for her always. It was reassuring for her, or at least he thought so, and after she calmed down a bit, she looked parted and looked at him. He watched her turn into a 16 year old to a helpless child in front of his eyes. He gave her a face asking what was going on and that's when she said it.

"I'm dying Jace."**  
UH OH! Lol a cliffhanger! :D I love them tehe anyways REVIEW PLEASE!**


	15. Chapter 14

** LISTEN TO THIS SONG WHILE READING THIS:**  
** This is the Thing by Fink from Dear John!**

JPOV  
My heart seemed to stop and I everything around me moved in slow motion. I felt my walls crumbling around me and my body still. My mouth ran dry and panic flooded my mind. Dying. His Clary was dying. But she couldn't, not yet. They just got together, everything was going so well. They were happy, she was happy, her treatment was progressing. He began to shake his head fiercely and Clary cupped her delicate hands around her face. He noticed that the little red head in front of him had been hooked to all different tubes. Some going in her arms, shooting medicine to her veins, and a breathing tube was in her nose. She had dark circles under her eyes and was extremely pale. To put it plain it simple, she looked like shit. He suddenly got up. He was angry, very angry, and he didn't know why.

"NO! That's not true! You're getting better! I know you are! You can't die, not yet." His voiced was in a frantic state as he said these words. Jace was feeling like a helpless child, while Clary was unsettlingly calm. She shook her head silently and reached out for him.

"Jace please come here." He pushed her hands away and her face fell instantly. "It isn't anything to get upset over. There is nothing that either of us can do about it." He stared at her for a long while. He felt a hard pressing on his chest that was getting to hard to handle.

"There must be something my dad can do. He can give you more chemo and that will make you better and then everything will be fine." As soon as he started saying the words Clary began shaking her head again.

"It doesn't work like that Jace. It's complicated."

"Why're you dying? Why you? What's wrong? Do you need something? Blood? Bone Tissue?"

"My kidney is failing. One shut down already and the other is infected with cancer. I'm dying Jace, and you can't fix it."

"What about a transplant?"

"That's highly unlikely. I know two of my friends with cancer died before they got a donor for an organ. It has to be a match Jace. Blood and all. My blood type is very rare and it's highly unlikely they'll find a donor." Jace had a tiny bit of hope spring him.

"But they still could, that's all that matters. They could. I can get tested and everything. If I was a match I coul-"

"No Jace. I couldn't take a kidney from you. And even if it is a match, there is a chance my body could reject it. If that happened, if my body rejected it I mean, you would have given me something you may need." Jace grabbed her hands and brought them to cup his face. There were tears in his eyes as he stared at his fire haired beauty.

"You can live with one kidney Clary."

"I know Jace, I do. But it comes with consequences. You can't play football, or hockey, or hardly any sports. You can't go out and get wasted with your friends. I want you to have a normal life Jace."

"I don't care about any of that stuff. And another thing you should know is my life is already abnormal."

"Look there is no need to even talk about this now Jace." Jace looked at her with a tear threatening to run down his face. He wouldn't cry. He had to reassure Clary he was her rock. He couldn't cry in front of her, not now, and not ever.

"I need to talk about this Clary. I need to talk about the potential to get better. I need…I need… I need you." No matter how incredibly sappy it was (and it was) It was the honest to goodness truth. He needed her and definitely more than anyone else. Definitely more than her parents, or Simon, and more than God or whoever was up there, but whoever it was, he was threatening to take Clary away from him.

"Jace…" And that was all she said before he heard the door open. They teenagers looked to the door to find Jocelyn and Luke staring back at them. "Hey mom." Clary said with a small smile.

"Jace, do you mind if we have a moment with Clary?" Jace could easily tell Lukes' voice was filled with sorrow. He knew he should nod and go but he hesitated for a moment. He hated to leave Clary but her parents probably wanted to speak with her so he stood up. As he was leaving, he noticed a brochure in Jocelyn's hands. She hadn't had that when she came in the hospital, had she? No, she hadn't. Jace looked at it closer. It was a blue color with stars all over it. It had a picture of a child on it smiling. It kind of looked like something from a Disney movie. The words on it read: MAKE-A-WISH FOUNDATION. Even though Jace didn't know to much about cancer he knew about the Make A Wish Foundation. He had seen commercials on television about it. It was for kids that were going to die…and apparently his father thought so too, considering she had just gotten the brochure.  
Jaces' anger had reached its limits. He suddenly barged out of the room and down the hall to his fathers' office.

CPOV  
Clary could tell Jace was upset when he left the room but there was nothing she could do. He wasn't handling it well, and truth be told, she wasn't handling it either. When she had awaken to Robert, he seemed off, and when she asked what was wrong he told her. It was short, sweet, and to the point. Robert didn't beat around the bush, especially with his patients. She was dying. She didn't need to be told why (but Robert did anyway) and she didn't need it to be told the chances she was going to live. She just needed to know how long she had. How long she would get with her parents. How long she would get to be with her friends. And more importantly, how long she would be with Jace.

"Clary sweetie," Jocelyn said snapping Clary to attention. Her mother sat on the side of the bed and Luke sat in the chair Jace sat moments before. Her mother looked to her lap, as f not being able to meet Clarys' face. Clary reached out and squeezed her mothers' hand and Jocelyn met her eyes. She was crying of course, but there was also a smile of understanding on her face. She made a sniffle noise and handed a brochure to Clary. It was for the Make A Wish Foundation. Clary looked at it then to her parents.

"I don't need this mom." Clary said handing it back.

"Clary, Robert told-" Luke started but Clary cut him off quickly.

"I know what he told you. That I'm dying but I don't need it because I already have what I want. Everything I want right now at least." Clary thought back to her list. She hadn't finished all of the books she wanted to read but she did get Jace, which was better than anything she could ever imagine. Her mother gave her another small smile and took the paper back.

"Where do we go from here?" Jocelyn asked Clary after a few minutes.

"Now we just wait and enjoy the time we have." It wasn't Clary who answered but her father, Luke. "Just enjoy our time together." Clary nodded and let a few tears fall but wiped them away before they could see.

"How much time is that?" Her mother asked her and Luke looked to her too. Apparently Robert left that for Clary to say.

"It doesn't matter." Clary answered her, looking between them both. "At least we have some time right?" Jocelyn nodded accepting the answer. There was no doubt in her mind that Jocelyn had bawled when she heard the upcoming death of her daughter. Any parent would grieve the death of their child, especially if you were their only child. Clary grabbed her mother and held her tight, letting her burst into sobs all over her hospital gown. Clary felt more like a mom then a daughter, but strangely that was alright with her. Clary spotted Luke also crying but not the sobs that her mother was letting out. No one talked, only cried, only thought of what was to come.

JPOV  
Jace finally made his way to Roberts' office, and despite Jaces' earlier filing, it had become cluttered again. He found his father, looking at his lunch instead of eating it. Jace wondered if he did that every time he told a patient they were going to die. But the thought didn't last long, because Jace was determined to find out exactly what was wrong with Clary. His fathers' head snapped up as he opened the door to the room.

"Jace…I know what you're going to say."

"No you don't. You have no idea." Jace snapped at him with anger.

"You're angry because you feel helpless Jace. Please just try to calm down." Why was everyone say that to him today?

"Calm? How can I be calm about this? My girlfriend is dying and you want me to be calm?" Robert made a warding gesture, mainly because he didn't know what Jace was going to do.

"There isn't anything you can do Jace."

"No me, you. You're going to find out what the hell is happening! Give her more drugs or something!" Robert shook his head, just as Clary had.

"It isn't that simple."

"Why?" Jaces' voice had changed from anger to a desperate child. "Why is this happening to her? She didn't do anything." Jace let himself cry, let himself breakdown, let himself be weak. "She can't die. I can't –I won't let her." Robert suddenly gave his son a tight hug, and Jace just hugged back crying.

"I know Jace. I don't understand it either."

"I want to get a blood test to see if my kidney is a match. If so I want to give Clara kidney." Jace managed this in between sobs. Robert just smiled and said alright as Jace soaked his shoulder.

Jace wouldn't let Clary die. Not now. Not ever.

**Sorry it's short, and nothing really happens but yeah I loved the break down moment with Jace! D: It made me want to hug him too! :D Anyways did you listen to the song? If not ur a loser. Lol JK**  
** Thanks for all the support by the way!**  
** PLEASE REVIEW! (15 reviews and I'll update again)**


	16. Chapter 15

**HARRY POTTER PARK…..was epic! I went and it was amazing! I have pictures on my profile if any of you people want to see the castle. I'm only posting a couple bc I have like a hundred of them. And if you watched the opening on the Today show then yay! Al roker was in the same hotel as us! And I knew where the harry potter cast was. They were in the Portofino hotel and I wanted to stalk them but mom said no blah XDDD anyways good to be home heres your chapter.**

Jace finally let go of Robert and went to the bathroom. He cleaned his face up for Clary then walked back to her room. Just as he did so, he found Jocelyn and Luke exiting. They're cheeks were red and puffy from crying and of course sad looks hung on their faces. 

"Jace." The words were like thick fog in the air. Jace was about to say something when he felt arms wrap around him. It was Jocelyn. She gripped him tightly around his chest and after a moment of hesitation he hugged back. It was odd that he was hugging her but comforting too. He watched as Luke touched her back gently and she released. He wasn't jealous but he could probably tell it was making Jace uncomfortable. Without another word they both brushed by him and Jace watched their retreating figures. 

He didn't understand what had happened with Clarys' parents but he refused to dwell on it. He made his way to Clary and she gave him a smile that caused his heart to ache. He would always love that smile and hopefully, always get to look at it. He didn't, however, smile back. He couldn't smile as happy as he was to see her, he just couldn't. Her smile soon faded when she didn't get one in return, and she heaved a heavy sigh… 

"Jace please, I just really…need you right now." Jace silently walked over to her and sat down on the edge of her bed. Jace reached out and stroked her cheek with his thumb and gave a small smile. 

"I know. But it's hard for me to handle the thought of my girlfriend…leaving." She gave a nod before looking down to her hands again. 

"I don't want to leave. Honestly I want nothing more than to just stay with you. To be with you." Clary said, holding his hand in hers. 

"You are and you will be." 

"Jace please don't-"She was about to say but Jace cut her off. 

"I'm getting my blood tested to see if we're a match. And if we are, I'm giving you my kidney." Clary was about to protest when someone else spoke up. 

"Same here." It was Isabelle. They both turned to look at the raven haired beauty would stood beside Maia, Magnus, Simon and Alec. 

"What're you guys doing here?" Clary asked the four that stood next to the door. 

"Well when you fainted in English class, I was kind of the one to text Jace." Isabelle admitted and Clary looked at the others. She wasn't surprised to see Simon at all. Jocelyn probably called his mom, and his mom told him. 

"Oh…" That was all Clary could say before Simon came over to her. 

"You okay Fray?" Simon said bending over and kissing her forehead. 

"As good as can be expected I suppose," She answered. She loved how brotherly and protective he was with her. She saw a glare passed to Jace from Simon and she smacked Simon's arm. "Violent much?" 

"Jerk much?" Clary retorted. 

"Touché," Simon responded with a smile, making a giggle erupt from Clary. 

"Anyways," Izzy said as things died down," what are they going to do to you?" 

"What do you mean?" Clary asked her a little confused.  
"I mean are they just going to sit around and wait till your kidneys fail or…?" 

"No no no. I'm going to have to do dialysis until they find a donor to give me a transplant." 

"What's dialysis?" Alec asked, speaking for the first time. 

"It's where they clear your body of waste and stuff, you know, what the kidneys do." Everyone nodded in understanding. 

"Where did your mom and dad go?" Magnus asked draping an arm around Alec, who ended up turning red. 

"They err went home I think. My mom needs time as does Luke. They just need to deal with this as best they can." There was a heavy silence around them that was uncomfortable. But Clary knew what they wanted to ask, she could tell by the look on their faces. 

"How long?" Isabelle finally asked breaking the silence. "How long do you have left?" Everyone's' eyes were on Clary as she looked to Jace then back at them…  
"A good amount." 

"How long Fray? A week, two weeks, a month, a year," Simon pressed. 

"1 month to 2." Everyone around her immediately bowed their heads while Clary shook hers. 

"Please don't cry or be sad. I don't want that. I want everyone to be happy that I get the time that I get. Be happy that I get to spend a little more time with you all. Let's not spend the time thinking about what it'll be like when I'm gone." 

"We won't have to. I'm getting my blood tested and if it's a match you are taking my kidney Clary." Jace stated in a voice that was backed with force. 

"I already said-" 

"We all are." Alec's voice seemed to echo throughout the room with a thunder. 

"No-" Clary tired to protest but she was cut short. 

"I know some of us have known you longer and better than others in this room but…you make Jace happy. And we don't want to be selfish jerks that hold their extra organs." A chuckle seemed to escape past everyone's lips. Clary, despite the small laugh she gave, wasn't at all happy. 

"But I care what happens to you guys. You may need it. I can't take something you may need. Do you even know what you can and can't do after you get your kidney removed?" Clary wasn't about to let them give up their kidney's so easily. Not that she wanted to die, it was just she needed to know everyone was sure with their decision. 

"We are all sure Fray. Get over it." Simon grinned and Clary rolled her eyes giving an exasperated sigh in the process.  
"I can't say I'm ecstatic about it but fine. If anyone in this room has a match with my rare blood type, you may give me a kidney." Jace leaned over with a small smile and kissed the red head on the forehead. 

"Now what?" Maia asked as the door swung open. Robert stepped in wearing his usual white over coat and scrubs. He had Clary's file in hand and a nurse stood next to him with a small metal cart. She had blonde hair, blue eyes, and wore bright blue gloves. She was thin and had a pale face that was decorated with loads of makeup. The cart next to her had several of needles placed on small trays on top of it. 

"That's a good question. Your answer is you get tested for a blood match while Clary has a nap." Clary knew that was code word for everyone get out so she can rest. They all started to follow Roberts' orders, all except for Jace of course. 

"Can I do it later dad?" Jace asked when Robert arched an eyebrow in his direction. 

"No. Besides Clary needs a break from you she is probably tired of seeing your face." Robert smiled teasingly at Jace, who threw him a glare. Clary bit her lip trying to stifle a laugh. 

"Ha ha. Very Funny." Jace said giving Clary a sweet chaste kiss then exiting the room. 

"Let me know if you need anything." Robert stated before exiting the room as well, leaving Clary alone to sleep. 

**So yeah the chapter was short and in my opinion repeated some of last chapter but everyone needed to be filled in on what was going on. The next few chapters will be about building Jace and Clary's relationship, and the building of friendship with the rest of the gang. Then comes the finale hahahahahahahahahahhahaha and I have some pretty EPIC ideas for it! Anyways REVIEW! Or I will hunt you down and drown you while you bathe.**


	17. Chapter 16

**Hey guys! I just wanted to say how much I appreciate you guys for reviewing my stories and alerting them. It really means a lot to me so thanks! I also wanted to thank my beta BlondeHairBlueEyes14! You rock Mandy! And also to let you know I wrote a new story and I think it's going to be one of my best! It's called The Bridge Between Us! It would be awesome if you checked it out if you haven't already! Thanks to the people who have reviewed on it as well as y other stories too! So here is your next chapter!**

Days seem to go by quickly for Jace and Clary. They kind of blended together, something that Jace was having an anxiety about. There hadn't been any news on the blood test and Jace was starting to think the hospital didn't care at all. Clary grew weaker while Jace felt the same. It wasn't fair that she was sick and he wasn't. He would take her place if he was allowed but he wasn't and that's what angered him.

Jace noticed a sort of cosmic twist in the universe as more and more people from school visited. It wasn't just the chess team or anyone Clary knew, but it was a lot of people that used to make fun of her. Jace despised them. He knew they were just there to feel better about themselves. They figure if they took an hour or so out of their day and see her that they would be able to sleep at night. But then there was Clary. She wasn't angry that they were there for themselves, nor did she hate them for it. She would smile and thank them for their visit. And if they brought her gifts like get well soon cards, flowers, or balloons, she would thank them again and then say her goodbyes as they left.

For that she was a saint in Jaces' eyes. He had never seen someone swallow their anger or hatred like that. Then again he doubted Clary had any. He had also noticed that Clary had grown closer to his family and friends, all except Sebastian and Aline of course. Jace hadn't seen them in a while but he was sure that would change when he went back to school on Monday. He had been with Clary since she entered the hospital and missed a lot of school. And he would gladly miss more for her if his mom and dad weren't pushing him to go back to school. Not only were they pushing him but Clary was too.

"Why should I go back? Even if I'm at school I'll be worried about you." Jace argued as he stretched, just waking up from a nap.

"Because I said so Jace, you need an education." Clary said in a small whisper. She had just been in dialysis before their little talk and was still tired from the medicine they were giving her.

"You sound like my mother." Jace whined as he grabbed her left hand that had been resting on the bed. He stroked her hand with his thumb lightly as she laughed. 

"You've told me that four times already in the past two days. Now you're going to school. Get over it." Jace rolled his eyes just as the door open and Isabelle popped her head in. 

"Hello love birds! I hope I'm not interrupting anything." The raven haired beauty said as she took a seat beside Clary on the opposite side of Jace.

"Actually not this time." Jace said sitting back in his chair and yawning. He rubbed the back of his neck, groaning in the process. He had been sleeping in the same chair for days. Robert kept insisting he go home and sleep but he was afraid to leave Clary. If something happened and he wasn't there it would kill him.

"You should really go home and rest before school tomorrow." Clary touched Jaces' cheek gently and he turned his head slightly, kissing her palm.

"I'm not leaving until school tomorrow." Jace said touching her hand that was on his cheek. She frowned at him and shook her head. 

"Jace please go home for a while. Eat dinner with your family. Do the rest of your make up work and sleep. Please for me." Jace simply shook his head at Clarys' protests.

"I can't Clary. I can't leave you what if something happens and –"Clary put a finger to his lips to silence his ramble. 

"Shhh…I'm fine. Just go home for the night and I'll see you tomorrow, right Izzy?" 

"Clarys' right Jace, you should go home and rest for a while. Clary or dad will call you if anything's wrong or if they get the results of the test back." Jace heaved a sigh and looked at Clary. Her expression was anxious with a mix of worry. He knew he would just have to suck it up and go home eventually. 

"Alright. I'll go home before dinner starts." Clary and Izzy beamed with accomplishment.

"Good. Now anyway, Clary, I can't wait until you get out of this stupid ugly hospital. We can go shopping for the next school dance, see a movie, have sleepovers, it'll be a blast." Clary laughed a little and Isabelle smiled.

"I hope so." That was all Clary could say before Magnus and Alec came in. 

"Well hello princess." Magnus said in his usual cheerful voice. "How're you feeling today?" 

"I feel good today." Clary said and he smiled. Magnus had taken a liking to Clary, along with Alec. They treated her like she was their little sister.

"Alec what are you doing here? I thought you had a game today." Jace stood up and stretched out his legs as Alec nodded. 

"Yeah I did. It's over already, and we won of course. Anyways, I came because mom is having a cookout today and wants you home. Now. That means you to Izzy." Izzy rolled her eyes and stood up.

"Bye Clary. I'll see you later." Isabelle gave Clary a hug and then joined her brother by the door. Clary then focused her gaze on Jace, who was being very hesitant to leave. 

"Go Jace." Clary warned as he almost sat back down in the chair. "I promise you'll be called if something happens okay? Go have fun with your family and friends." Jace locked his eyes with hers for a moment. He had conflicting feelings about going and about having the cookout in the first place. He felt bad leaving Clary by herself as they had fun. 

"Are you sure?" Jace asked as he looked to his family and Magnus then backed to her. 

"Positive, go have fun. " Clary smiled which put Jaces' mind at ease. He leaned down and kissed her full on the mouth. Clary soon responded, and after a few moments they separated. Jace picked up his overnight bag, full of dirty clothes, and went over to his siblings and Magnus.

"Bye Clary. I love you…" 

"I love you too…" Jace smiled and left the room with the other 3 trailing behind him. 

By Monday, Jace had called Clary 4 times to check on her. It was weird not being able to see her every day. But he did like sleeping in his own bed and actually eating real food instead of hospital food, which tasted like cardboard.

Jace walked into the school cafeteria with Isabelle at his side. She went on about Clarys' friend Simon. Isabelle had been crushing on him since Clary had been in the hospital. It was surprising that Isabelle actually liked him. He was an anime loving, video gaming nerd. And Jace wasn't too fond of him and vice versa. The main reason was because Simon was in love with Clary, and he doubted that would change. Jace didn't have the heart to tell Isabelle though. It would break her heart. Jace sat down at his regular table, between Alec and Maia. He noticed Sebastian and Aline closer than usual. Were they dating now?

"Well well well look who finally decided to show up for school today. Nice to see you Jace." Sebastian said leaning over the table with a suspicious grin on his face.

"Long time no see Seb. You and Aline dating now?"  
"You got it. Guess she finally found herself a man huh?" The whole table looked at him with shock. He had insulted Jace right in front of them. But why? Jace and him had been friends since 4th grade. 

"Excuse me?" Jace asked putting down his sandwich. 

"So since your running with losers now I think it's time I booted you from the table." Seb said giving Jace a shooing motion.

"Sebastian this table is where we all sit." Isabelle was appalled that Sebastian was asking Jace to move.

"Not anymore. Jace is now out of our group." Sebastian's eyes scanned over the table with a glare. He was prepared to knock down anyone who challenged him. His eyes finally rested on Jace, who was casting a seriously dark look at him. "But whenever your girlfriend finally dies you're welcome back."

Jace snapped. He lunged across the table, knocking over the table and pushing Sebastian to the floor. Jace clenched his fist into a ball, latched onto Sebastian's collar, and punched him in the face repeatedly. He could hear the crowd around him yelling 'Jace' and 'Fight' but he hardly cared. He pushed Sebastian in the nose as hard as he could, causing it to break or maybe even shatter. It wasn't until minutes later he felt the principle and other teachers prying them off each other. 

Jace tried to charge again but two teachers were pulling on his jacket, and the other in front of him pushing him backwards. Sebastian was holding his nose, as blood dripped to the floor.

The next thing Jace knew he was home. The principle had called Maryse and told her to come pick him up. She wasn't at all thrilled Jace had been suspended from school. She screamed at him when they finally made it home and he was sent to his room. She had grounded him from television and internet until further notice. Mind you she had been easy on him because Clary was in the hospital, so she let him keep his cell phone and allowed him to go the hospital daily. Except for today that is. He was supposed to stay in his room all night. The thing was he had to tell Clary he had gotten into a fight and that he had been suspended.

That didn't go over to well either. She was upset about it and Jace didn't know what to say except sorry. She forgave him but was disappointed in him. Clary knew he was better than all that, which was one of the reasons he loved her. But now, hours later, he found himself staring at the ceiling after dinner, and throwing a ball into the air. He sat there thinking like crazy about different things, until he was interrupted by Alec. 

"Hey man." Jace said throwing the ball at him. Alec laughed, threw it back and missed.

"You threw some pretty nasty punches today." Alec looked Jace over and leaned against the door frame. "I was surprised." 

"Yeah me too, but I had to defend Clary somehow. He basically wished her dead." Alec frowned at Jace and looked to the ground. "What Alec?" 

"This girl has changed you and you don't even know it man." Alec said before disappearing from the doorway.  
Jace didn't know what Alec meant. He hadn't changed that much had he? And if he had wasn't it for the better? Jace shook his head, not wanting to think about it too much. He shut off the lights to his room and crawled into bed. He texted Clary goodnight and drifted to sleep. 

Somewhere in the middle of the night, Jace heard a buzzing noise. He groaned hoping it would stop, but it didn't. It kept going off, waking him from a deep slumber. He wondered what it was and why it was buzzing. Then finally he figured out it was his phone going off. He looked at the clock on his bedside table that read 4 a.m. Who the hell was calling him at this hour? None the less he picked up the phone and checked the caller I.D. It was Clary. Jace immediately snapped to attention. He sat up straight away opening the phone. 

"Clary? Are you okay? What's wrong?" Jace frantically yelled into the phone as he started to dress. He knew something was wrong, not only because of the call but also because the voice on the other end wasn't Clary's. It was Jocelyn's. 

"Jace, I'm sorry for disturbing you but you better get down here." Jocelyn's serious tone would have given Jace a heart attack, if it hadn't been beating fast in the first.

"I'm on my way." And with that Jace grabbed his keys, shut his phone, and was out speeding out the door.

**SO what did you think? Like it? Hate it? Tell me what you think!  
Question for Preview:  
What do you think is wrong with Clary?  
REVIEW PLEASE!  
claryxjace**


	18. Chapter 17

A thousand things were going through Jaces' head as he pulled into the hospital parking lot. He didn't know what he was going to do when he made it in the hospital. He just had to get in there. Fast. Jace sung open the door to the hospital and swiftly ran past the reception desk, and to Clarys' room. Jocelyn and Luke sat outside it with worried expressions on their faces. He ran down the hall, only to be greeted with hands stopping him from going inside the room.

"No Jace. You can't go in there." Luke was practically pushing him backwards by his shoulders. Jace tried to fight him by pushing forward a little, keeping his eyes on the shut door.

"Let me go! I have to see her!" Jace didn't even know he was yelling until he saw a few people in the hall looking at the struggle.

"You can't Jace!" Luke didn't scream at Jace but his voice was very stern. It made Jace snap to attention and look at Luke with a devastated, broken expression.

"What's going on? What's wrong?" Jace said in a small voice. He felt so angry mainly because he was so helpless. He wanted, no, needed everything to be okay. He couldn't imagine never seeing her face again, or feel the touch of her delicate hands. He loved her. Loved her with everything he had, and he couldn't lose her now.

"She went into cardiac arrest." Jocelyn's voice was grave when the words slipped off her tongue. Jace suddenly went into a feeling of numbness.

Cardiac arrest.

It was a word that he had heard on television dozens of times. He knew the definition all too well. It's is when your heart stops beating and you stop breathing. So basically when you die, which meant Clary died. Sure you could stabilize a person, bring them back and all, but the fact was still emanate; Clary died. She died and she may or may not come back.

"How long ago?" Jace felt a tear roll down his cheek, and he immediately wiped it with the sleeve of his shirt.

"About 20 minutes ago." Luke answered and Jaces' heart dropped. That was too long ago. She is dead. Gone. Never coming back. And just those thoughts ago were too much for Jace to handle. He felt like the walls around him were closing in, and it was getting hard to breathe. He needed air. He suddenly felt his chest tighten and his throat close. Then before he knew it he was having a panic attack on the floor of St. Idris.

A few moments later a nurse, Jace didn't know, was at his side. She put an oxygen mask over his face and gave him air by squeezing the end of the balloon shaped device that was hooked to the mask. Jace tried taking deep breaths but it came out short. His vision became blurry around the edges, but what he could see was his father exiting the room and hurrying to him.

"Jace, calm down, it's okay. Clary's fine, she's stable." This made Jace calm down gradually. He felt the pressure from his chest gone and his throat open. He could finally breathe normally, and when he was calm, the nurse removed the mask and walked away.

"She is?" Jocelyn sounded relieved and the worry disappeared from her face entirely. Robert nodded and Jocelyn, with Luke, went into Clarys' room. Jace wanted to follow, so he started to get up, but was soon stopped by Robert.

"Please let me see her dad."

"I'm going to but let her parents have their time with her. Are you alright?" Robert asked pinching his brows together in question.

"I'm fine. I just have to see Clary." Robert looked at him for a few moments, trying to figure out how he was going to word what he was about to say.

"Jace, you are going to have to let her go eventually." Something inside Jace snapped and he immediately stood up and gave a glare at Robert.

"How the hell can you say that?" Jace screamed in his father face. "There is hope for us, for her! All I have to do is wait for the kidney results, and if I'm a match, I'm giving it to her."

"But if not, then what are you going to do?" Robert asked getting in Jaces' face. "I'm just trying to help you. You will have to let her go one day Jace. I'm saying this from not only a doctors' view but also a fathers."

Jace turned away from his father. He knew Robert was right but he couldn't accept it right now. He couldn't let go, not yet. There was still a chance she could live, and all his money was riding on that right now.

"I know you're right but I can't let go right now. Not today." Just then the door to Clarys' room opened and Jace looked to see Jocelyn and Luke exiting.

"She's asking for you, Jace." Jace nodded and swiftly went into the room, nodding to his father before hand.

The first thing he noticed when entering Clarys' room was that the only light was above her head and it was not very bright. But it was bright enough for Jace to see Clary lying on the bed. She looked weaker and paler than she had been.

"Hey…" She whispered as he came closer. She lifted her hand a little to touch him and he took it.

"Hey." Jace sat down in the chair next to her bed and kissed her hand. "How're you feeling?"

"I'm okay." But she wasn't. Jace was right; he was paler and weaker. She could barely keep her eye open, but then again what should you expect from someone who came back from death. "I heard you had a panic attack. Are you okay?"

"I thought I lost you." Jaces' voice was barely audible to Clary but she caught ear of it and heaved a sigh. Clary reached up, letting go of Jaces' hand, and touched his cheek.

"Jace-"

"I know what you're going to say. Dad just gave me the speech. I'll have to let you go one day, but not today."

"I wasn't going to say that, although it's true. I was going to say that I can't believe you had a panic attack and that it scared me."

"I promise I'll put you in little stress as possible from now on." Jace smiled and kissed her forehead. Clary felt a surge of anger go through her.

"Stop it Jace." He froze. What had he done wrong? Was it something he did? Or something he said?

"Stop what?"

"Stop pretending like you can deal with this when I know it's killing you."

"I just had a moment of weakness Clary. I don't want you to worry about me. I'm the one that should worry about you." Jace caressed her brow with his knuckles gently. She immediately responded by leaning into his touch.

"No, it hurts. And I should've told you to deal. You should express how you feel to me. So tell me, please, whenever you're feeling sad or lost. Don't keep it inside. I don't want you to have another panic attack." Jace simply nodded and locked his gaze with her. He leaned down and kissed her softly.

"I'm alright. Promise."

*****************************************************************************************************************************************

The next day, afterschool, the rest of the gang joined Jace and Clary in Clarys' room. They had been anticipating the test results for days. It was finally time to see what the next step was.

"Hey Clary, how're you feeling? Are you alright?" Isabelle said, taking a seat at the foot of Clarys' bed. They had all been informed of Clary going into cardiac arrest the previous night, and were very concerned for their friend.

"I'm alright."

"Good because if not I would have to kick your little ginger ass." Clary and Isabelle both laughed as the door swung open. A familiar face stepped through the door, dressed in a white coat and scrubs.

"Hello Robert." Luke said nodding to him.

"Hello. How is everything today?" Robert turned to Clary and the others. Clary smiled and breathed a sigh.

"Everything is good."

"Maybe things will get better. Would you like to hear the results to the blood tests?" All of a sudden there was a tense silence among them. They had been waiting to hear the results for days but none were really sure they wanted to hear. If someone was a match it would be a bright future for Clary, but if not then…Jace simply shivered at the thought of what he would do if none of them were a match.

Robert, knowing their answer, removed several papers from a folder that were in his hand. He looked at the first one. "Jocelyn you aren't a match for Clary, I'm sorry." Jace started to sweat. He didn't know what to think of that. "Luke. I'm sorry you aren't either."

If her parents aren't a match who is going to be? "Izzy, Alec, Magnus, and Maia," Robert paused as he looked at each sheet. "You four aren't matches either."

"Sorry Clary." Izzy said with a frown.

"It's okay guys." Clary replied sweetly. Jaces' heart was going at speeding and he became very nervous. Only two people were left. Himself and Simon.

"Simon, I'm sorry. Neither are you." Jace felt like crying. What would his results say? Would he be a match? He hoped to god he would be.

"And now Jace." Robert looked over his sheet and furrowed his brow.

Oh no, Jace thought as his father looked at him and then back to the paper. Robert looked like he was in shock. He slowly met Clary and Jaces' eyes. This was it. Clary's fate was in Roberts' next sentence.

"Jace…"

**THE END! JK lol what did you think? Love it? Hate it? REVIEW! There are only a couple chapters of this story. Sorry. But thanks everyone fo following this story! You people rock! Love ya. Oh and btw read my Bridge Between Us story! It's epic! Better than this one I think and I just started it lmao.**  
**-claryxjace**

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	19. Chapter 18

**Hey people! I love you guys! You are amazing! Thanks for all the reviews! I **** would also like to say to those of you who haven't checked out my new story The Bridge Between Us that you should. It is amazing if I do say so myself. And to**** all of you that have I love you and you're pretty amazing! :D now on with your**** new chapter. I've been really procrastinating this chapter but it is finally **** done. **

"Jace…you are a match." Robert's voice was filled with surprise but Clary also heard something else, happiness.

"Are you sure?" Jocelyn asked practically jumping out of her seat with joy.

"I'm positive." Robert said with a smile. Everyone was filled with pure bliss at that moment. Clary was going to live. She actually had a chance to make it and while they were ecstatic, Clary wasn't. She had been hoping it would be anyone but Jace. She could never give him anything in return.

_Except love_.

That small voice in the back of Clary's mind was the only thing that made her brighten a little. However, there was another part of her that was questioning if it was enough. "I want to give my kidney to Clary as soon as possible." Clary looked at Jace for a moment. He had a mixture of emotions on his face. Happiness, determination, and the most prominent was love. Love for her to be exact, and Clary realized he didn't need anything in return, just the promise that she loved him back; and she did.

Robert faced Clary, giving her a smile, and she returning it. "Well Clary? When should we do this?"

Clary weighed everything then looked to Jace. "Whenever you're ready Jace," she said before looking at Robert again, who glanced at Jace.

"Can we do it today?" Clary nearly did a double take with her eyes wide eyes locked on his figure. He seriously wanted to this today? Clary turned back to Robert, who checked his watch then looked back to them.

"I can get you in the OR in about an hour or two. Does that sound okay?" Clary didn't know what to say. This was all happening so fast. It was only a few minutes ago that she found out Jace and her were a match in the first place. She hadn't even had time to process that, let alone have the actual surgery in an hour.

"Clary?" Jace asked interrupting her never ending cycle of thoughts. Clary blinked slowly and glanced between everyone's eyes. They were waiting for an answer from her. "What do you think Clary?"

"I…uh…I…that sounds okay," The red head answered with a tiny smile.

"Alright then well let's get started." Robert went to the closet in Clarys' room and grabbed an extra night gown from the top shelf and tossed it to Jace. "Put that on and then crawl into that bed next to Clary. I'll be back." And with that Robert left through the doorway.

The hour seemed to tick by quickly. Clary was in full anxious mode of the surgery. She was so terrified that tears were spilling over her pale cheeks. Jace tried his best to comfort her but it was no use. She couldn't control herself; everything finally seemed to sink in.

"It's okay Clare Bear don't cry." Jace stroked Clary's hair gently as Isabelle and the others tried to stop her from crying. Robert stood in the front of the room talking with Clarys' parents. They had signed release forms and now they were just waiting for Clary to tell them she was ready. Jace was ready and Clary didn't know how he could be so calm. It's not like Robert was performing the surgery. But then again, Jace knew the surgeon which is most likely what was keeping him so calm.

"I shouldn't but I can't help it."

"What're you scared of exactly?" Magnus questioned, taking a place on Clary's bedside.

"Something will go wrong, it won't work, and Jace will have wasted a kidney."

"It won't be a waste and it will work. I know it will. It has to." Jace said kissing her forehead.

"Jace? Clary? Are you ready now?" Robert asked looking between the two of them. Jace looked to Clary, who nodded and Jace made his way back to his bed. Robert smirked and the two nurses, which had been waiting in the doorway, went to Clarys' bed and started to roll her out.

They paused at the door, giving her parents a chance to grab her hand and wish her good luck. "We'll see you soon sweetie." Clary nodded and kissed their hands. She felt the wheels under the bed move and she was off to what hopefully was a brighter future.

**Hours Later~**

Clary opened her eyes to dim lights and a white ceiling. She felt a breathing tube back in her nose and the uncomfortable IV in her arm. She was out of surgery and she didn't feel all that different except she was sore from the stitches.

"Clary?" She heard a familiar voice ask. It was Jocelyn. Clary immediately looked around and found each of her family and friends faces.

"Hey," the red head croaked out. "Where's Jace?"

Isabelle responded by pointing to the bed next to Clary. Clarys' eyes followed her finger and landed on a sleeping Jace. "He was awake, but dad said he should rest so more."

"Meaning you should too." Simon added.

Clary had to admit she was hopelessly exhausted but had no desire to sleep. All she could think about is if the kidney would work. Would her body accept or reject it? She certainly couldn't feel a kidney working, so that question was left to Robert.

"I'm fine." Clary said trying to sit up but wincing when she did so. "Ouch."

"Take it easy," Luke said moving her bed up a little so she could get a better view of them. Just then Robert stepped through the door.

"You're awake, finally. I was starting to wonder. How do you feel?" Robert walked to her bedside and checked her pulse and heartbeat.

"I feel okay."

"Just okay? Not great or fantastic!" Clary laughed a little and Robert smiled.

"When will I know if it works?" Clary questioned seriously.

"About a week is when we should tell if it's working or not. We can give you some medicine to try and make it work but that doesn't always work." 

"You know how to brighten up a persons' day don't you?" A sarcastic mumble escaped the lips of the golden haired boy next to Clary. Clary turned her head to see that his eyes were still closed and a grin was across his lips.

"Open your eyes asshat." Jace opened his eyes and locked them with Clarys'.

"Hey…" He breathed and she replied the same. "You feeling okay?"

"I'm fine, you?"

"Peachy for someone who lost a body part," Izzy rolled her eyes, Alec and Magnus chuckled, and Simon muttered something under his breath.

"It was your own fault." Clary snorted. "You wanted to give me said body part."

"And now I'm inside you Clary." Jace whispered but loud enough for everyone else to hear. Isabelle and the rest of the group burst out laughing while Clary turned bright red. Thank god her parents hadn't been paying attention.

Robert smacked Jace over the head with the clipboard in his hand. " I just had surgery here!"

"Not on your head."

"I will if you keep smacking me with that." Clary rolled her eyes and laughed a little as Robert hit him again. "Ever heard of child abuse?"

"He barely hit you."

"You're supposed to be on my side."

"Sometimes I wonder how she puts up with you." Jace grumbled something and rubbed his head.

"You two need anything else?" Clary shook her head and Robert left through the door. And now we wait.

A week later Clary felt like crap. She didn't want to eat, or sleep, or do anything really. All she wanted was to have a few minutes of silence. Jace was at her bedside holding her hand. He had been released from the hospital that very day and hadn't left her side. Robert had insisted that he go home and rest but Jace wouldn't budge. Finally Robert stopped insisting and let Jace stay. Clary was thankful that Robert let Jace stay because she wanted Jace there with her. Of course he had been there all week but she didn't get to hold his hand or kiss him, like now for instance.

"Clary, you hungry?" Izzy asked pushing the tray full of food toward her. Clary shook her head and her mother went on to tell her that she should eat. It was getting insanely annoying.

"Please mother, stop okay. Everyone stop. I don't want to eat or sleep I just want everyone to please be quiet for a few minutes. Please?" Everyone immediately shut up. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop on the tiled floor. "Thank you." Jace caressed her hand gently, drawing his thumb in circles over her flesh. Clary closed her eyes and began to relax.

A few moments later Clary let out a groan from the door swinging open. "Not now please come back later." The ginger opened her eyes with a very concentrated Robert looking at her.

"Um..dad…is everything okay?" Jace asked and Robert heaved a sigh then looked to Clarys' parents.

"I have some news. Good and bad."

** Okay it was a lame chapter but hey my brain sucks at functioning today. Life is kind of sucky right now but I do have some good news. My friend in Iraq is coming home! Awesome right? **

** But anyway….REVIEW! And there are only 2 chapters left. D: Sad I know, right?**


	20. Chapter 19

**This is your next installment. I don't know if it seems to rushed or not but Ireally need to finish this story. So basically this is last chapter before the epilogue then I'm done. I loved the support I got on this story and I'm very thankful! Love you guys. There is not a lot of dialogue in the middle. It's just a time passer but then there is dialogue at the end. So yeah.**

It wasn't true, Jace thought as he sat down on the steps of the hospital. He couldn't believe he had heard what came out of Jocelyn and Luke's mouth. One minute they were outside then the next they were in her Clarys' room telling them the news. Jace was in utter shock that this was actually happening. He had given her a kidney a week ago and things were brighter for all of them but now this news was…No words could describe it actually. 

Jace propped his knees on his elbows and grasped his hair, pulling it until there was pain. He noticed some kids playing in a preschool across the street. He watched as they laughed, played tag, and just enjoy life. It was amusing to him and he couldn't figure out why. He felt a hand on his shoulder but he didn't look up. He felt the person sit down next to him and then there was silence for a while.

"What're you doing out here?" Roberts' voice rang in Jaces' ears, concern filling it whole heartedly. Jace didn't reply. Robert followed his eyes to the playground across the street. "Taking a trip down memory lane?"

Jace knew why he found it amusing now. He remembered when he was a kid on that very same playground, chasing girls, and getting on his teachers nerves. He wished it could be like that now. No worries, just coloring, Playdoh, and nap time. Simple. Easy. No doctors. No hospitals. No stress.

"Why do bad things happen?" Jace asked after a few minutes. Robert was starting to answer but Jace stopped him. "I mean Clary says it's because God had different paths for us all. She said that it's engraved in us before we are even born." 

"Looks like you have an answer then." 

"Not one I believe." Jace stated looking at Robert finally. "We learn all the time in church that God created everyone, the world, everything. We also learn he loves us and wants nothing but happiness for us." 

"Right." Robert said nodding to Jace as a sign for him to go on. 

"That doesn't make sense at all." 

"What do you mean?" 

"If he wants nothing but happiness for us then why does he hurt us? Death, sickness, grief, and heartache, it doesn't make us happy nor does it show us he loves us. So with that it makes me doubt there is a god." 

"Jace…" Robert couldn't say anything else. He didn't know what to say at all. He had never seen this Jace, ever. It was all too new. "I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything else." 

"Clary wants to see you…" 

"I can't right now. I want to but I just can't." Jace said dropping his head to look at his feet. "Is she upset I left?" 

"What do you think?" 

"Yes she is." 

"There is your answer." Robert got up and went inside, leaving Jace to his thoughts. 

"Jace?" He heard a voice ask. Jaces' head snapped up only to be faced with someone he never expected to see.

"Aline? What are you doing here?" Jace asked with hints of anger in his voice. He couldn't take this right now. 

"I wanted to talk." Aline said sitting beside him.

"How'd you know where I was?" He looked down to his lap with a sigh. 

"I guessed." 

"What do you want?" Jace asked looking at her again. "If you're here to apologize it's not accepted." Aline didn't look at Jace for a moment, instead she glanced at the hospital doors then back to her feet. 

"You love her a lot, don't you?" Jace nodded and smiled. 

"She's everything to me and she always will be. I've never felt this way about anyone." 

"She is pretty special then. You're a good guy Jace." Jace knew that Aline was hurting. He had just said he never felt this way about anyone and since him and Aline were involved previously, it was a reaction he was expecting. 

"Thanks I guess." 

"You know Sebastian is sorry for what he said." 

"Then why isn't he here himself?" Aline glanced to Jace then her feet once more. 

"Jace I'm here if you ever want to get back together or something." 

"Aline just…go please." Jace said anger starting to well in his gut. 

"How is she?" 

"Why do you want to know?" Aline stared at Jace then shrugged. " She's dying as of recent news. The kidney I gave her failed to work. She has about a week or 2 left." Jace buried his face in his hands and let out a few tears.

"I'm sorry." 

"No you aren't. You feel sorry for me, its two different things." 

"True." Aline admitted. "Is there any good news?" 

"She'll be comfortable when she does go. She won't be in pain." 

"That's good I suppose." 

"I have to go back inside now." Jace stood up along with Aline and they looked at each other for a few moments. 

"Can I come to?" Aline asked and Jace debated this. He didn't know how to come about this. What would Clary think if he brought in the girl that ridiculed her forever? 

"No you can't." Aline nodded, accepting the answer. She then started to go but he stopped her. "You asked me once why we broke up but I never gave you a reason." 

"Why did we?" 

"Because I was meant for Clary, and that's the simple truth." Aline didn't looked moved at all by what Jace said. She just turned abruptly on her heel and waved. 

"Well umm…bye Jace." She said, hurrying down the stairs. 

"Bye." Jace said flatly watching her leave. He then turned and went back inside to his red headed saint. 

Jace watched the rain hit the pane. It seemed to fit his mood brilliantly. He had been sitting at this hospital with nothing to do and no one to talk to, considering Clary had been asleep for a while. He watched the lightening decorate the sky with a certain edge and heard the thunder roll. 

''Hey…" He heard a small voice behind him whisper. His attention immediately went to the small fragile girl in the hospital bed. 

"Hey, how're you feeling?" 

"I'm okay." Jace caressed Clarys' hand gently and she smiled at him. 

"You need anything?" 

"No but I want something." 

"Anything." Clary waited a few moments before she finally said the thing she wanted more than anything.

"I wanna go home."

**5 Days Later~**

Jace helped Clary up the stairs to her house slowly, trying not to hurt her andhelp support her weak frame. Robert agreed to let her go home and had said it was the best place for her right now. Jace led her up the stairs while Jocelyn and Luke followed behind closely. Jace finally got her to her room and helped her lay down. When she was comfortable enough, he lay down next to her and her parents shut the door.

Hours seemed to dwindle by with no consideration of how precious time was to the both of them. They just lay there talking and sharing stories with each other. They talked about what Jace had thought about outside the hospital then his encounter with Aline. Clary didn't seem faltered by the story but he could tell it bothered her a little. However when he told her about the preschool across the street she smiled and closed her eyes. Jace then listened to her tell the story of her preschool days. It was enjoyable experience to listen to Clary talk, one that he would miss dearly but he would always have the memory.

**2 days later~**

Jace looked at the clock it read 11:15 p.m. He then heard the door open on the other side of the room. It was Robert here to check up on Clary. Her breathing had become shallow and it was getting exhausting for her to even speak but she never complained, not once. Jace went downstairs when he was asked knowing not to argue with him. He took his place among his friends and family just waiting.

That's all Jace seemed to do now was wait. He hated it with every fiber in his being too. He hated that his father was the one that could help her and he couldn't. It made him seriously think about his future, in a way he never had before. Clary did that. Made him believe and work up to his potential and if he loses her, he will surely die inside. Be an empty shell once more.

Jace looked at the clock again, 11:25. What was Robert doing up there? He didn't know what to do or think or say. He just had to be with Clary. That was his place, at Clary's side. He needed to be there… now. Jace stood up and started at pacing.

"Jace relax. It's okay, just standard check up." Izzy stated, resisting the urge to bite her fingernails. She never did it but her nerves were picking at her. 

"She can barely keep her eyes open anymore Izzy!" Jace yelled at her making everyone freeze and a tense silence fill the room. The next thing they heard was Roberts' heavy footsteps coming down the steps. Jace looked to him, his fathers' face unreadable. 

"Well?" Jocelyn asked finally. 

"It will take a miracle for her to survive through the night." Roberts' voice was full or sorrow and pain. Jaces' stomach dropped to his feet and his heart quickened. He was going to lose her tonight. Why tonight? Couldn't he keep her for just one more night? Of course he would always want one more night, he wanted forever. But that wasn't reality. "I would say goodbye tonight. You may not get another chance." Sniffles and tears started to fill the silent and tense room. And Jace felt like he was suffocating again. 

"We'll go first." Jocelyn and Luke stated. One by one people went up and talked to Clary. Then finally it was Jaces' turn. He went up the steps and cracked open the door to her room.

"Clary…" The words came out in a whisper and were followed by a small sob. 

"Jace don't…" Clary reached out to Jace and he swiftly went over to her and lay down beside her. Jace propped himself on his elbow, hovering over her face. He caressed her cheek lightly and she reached up, grabbed his hand, and kissed it. 

"Clary I-" 

"Don't say goodbye. I'm not going anywhere tonight." She shifted a little and let her eyes flutter close. "I refuse to leave you Jace." 

Jace gave a little smile and then sighed. He didn't know what to say to her. He wanted her to stay and the words made him almost jump for joy but something inside of him told him he had to let go. It was his fathers' voice. The day at the hospital when Clary went into cardiac arrest popped into his mind. His father had been right; he was going to have to let go someday. He couldn't be selfish anymore. 

Clary was reflected in his golden eyes at that moment. She looked weak, pale, and over all exhausted. This small pain flashed in his heart, there was only one thing it could be identified as…heartbreak. He hated this Clary. The one weak, tired, and so pale you could see almost every vein. Mind you she was still beautiful to Jace but he wanted to see her smile, and laugh. But she was fading from the grasp he thought he had on her and if he kept her any longer there would be nothing left.

"Clary…I love you, you know that right?" She cracked her eyelids opened and nodded. "Then I need you to do something for me." 

"Whatever you want." 

"Close your eyes." She did as she was told with a smile on her face. He leaned down and kissed her gently and she soon responded. It was a sweet kiss but something was in it that Clary couldn't recognize. Jace hesitated a moment before he moved down to her ear. 

"Do you remember that story you told me about the swing set? On how it was your favorite thing in the world to play on when you were little." Jace whispered to her, tears silently falling. 

"Yes I remember." 

"I want you to imagine you're on that same beat up old swing set as a little girl again. Now just focus on that for me." Clary smiled at the images in her mind. It was as clear as a picture on a screen or like a movie she had just watched and the favorite parts was popping up in her brain.

_Red and brown leaves swirled around the playground like a choreographed dance. A small girl with red braids in her hair was placed on a faded orange swing. It was Clary herself, dressed in her favorite dark red coat that touched her knees. A woman, older than Clary stood behind her with dark red hair, the woman she knew as her mother._

"Do you have it in your mind?" Jaces' question echoed I her ears. It was nice, like the narrator of a story. 

"Yes…" 

"Now picture yourself getting higher and higher on the swing almost like your flying."

_Clary felt the chilled autumn air on her face, nipping at her nose. She was completely content though. Her mother began pushing her high up into the sunny sky above her. She let out a spill of giggles as butterflies fluttered their wings against the walls of her stomach. She felt free and almost felt like she could fly into the sky and never land again. Then the only thing that existed was herself and the shining light above her. She grinned at it continued to fly backward and forward. She heard the sound of chains ringing in her ears with every shift of movement. She laughed again, enjoying the sound the swing created.  
_  
Clarys' heartbeat had slowed, and her breathing raspy; she was slipping from him. Jace tried to control his crying, he didn't want her to break concentration. He worked so hard to spit the next couple sentences out.

"You grip the chains tightly until your knuckles are white but what you don't know is that the chains are keeping you from something. You don't know what that something is but you know it will take you far away from everything. It scares you but you have to let go of the chains that are forbidding you from flying."

_Clary wanted to let go but she felt something telling her to stay safe and stop swinging. That one thing was keeping her from releasing her and bounding her to those chains. She couldn't let go, not yet._

Jace buried his face in her neck saying that last words so slowly his heart cried out from how agonizing they were to speak. His tears wet her neck and he finally whispered the last words. 

"I love you Clary… now…let go." 

Clary smiled and finally released the chains, feeling happy as a warm light wrapped around her like a blanket. She felt safe, loved, and at peace.

**OMG! I could not stop crying through the ending. I am literally bawling right now. Anyways I had been thinking about this chapter a while and thought I came up with a good ending scene. Epilogue next! :DDD**

** REVIEW!**

** P.S. I know you hate but I thought it was a very beautiful ending.**


	21. Epilogue

**_In loving memory of every cancer patient, family member or friend who has lost the battle with cancer, and in honor of the ones who continue to conquer it!_**

**10 years later~**

Jace made his way up the familiar front porch steps. He hadn't been here in a few years but everything was very much the same. He remembered when he traveled up these steps as a teenager and he wanted nothing more than to break down the door and charge to his red headed love. But things have changed, he was older now and she was gone, but not forgotten of course. That's why he was here in the first place. Jocelyn and Luke were having a party today to celebrate Clary's life on the anniversary of her death. They had had one every year but Jace was unable to attend. He had to celebrate Clary in his own way and what he was doing in school was because of Clary.

After she passed, Jace realized something. If she couldn't live, then he would live for her. The night she died in his arms made him upset yes, but also relieved. She wasn't in pain anymore, nor was she suffering. She was in a better place watching him. He often wished she was here to see what he has accomplished. He got his life together, graduated high school with honors, and was accepted to Alicante University that fall. He currently had a 3.5 GPA and was studying to be a doctor like his father. He wanted to help people like his Clary, and no doubt she would be proud of him.

Jace pushed his finger on the doorbell beside the oak door and waited. He hadn't seen everyone in a quite a while but he did talk to them. Simon and Isabelle had started dating after Clary passed and now they were married and expecting their first child. Simon had graduated college and got a job as a scientist. Isabelle became a teacher but quit after she found she was pregnant.

Alec and Magnus ended up together and now they lived just a few blocks from Alecs' parents. Magnus became a fashion designer and was now working at some fashion magazine. Alec decided to become a photographer and created his own business. He was now world known but he still had the same personality to him as always.

Maia ended up married to a guy name Jordan, who she met just after she graduated high school. She had gotten pregnant and didn't end up going to college, but Jordan did. He became a lawyer and they lived happily somewhere in New York.

Aline and Sebastian was a different story, however. They had an off and on again relationship for a few years before they finally decided to just end it once and for all. Aline met someone named Jonathan, and they married. Last Jace heard Aline was going to divorce court and her husband to jail for abuse. Jace and Aline ran into each other one day and they talked for quite a while. Mostly about Clary, school, and how Jace was. Sebastian, however, he heard no news of since him and Aline split. Jace and Sebastian did make up though. Jace forgave and forgot just like Clary had taught him but Seb never spoke to him again after the divorce. Jace knew he was probably okay, he was Sebastian of course.

Shortly after Jace hear noise in the house the door opened, and a pregnant black haired sister of his opened the door. "Jace!" She exclaimed wrapping him into an awkward hug, mainly because her belly was so huge.

"Hey Isabelle, I missed you." Jace smiled and Izzy led him to where the others were.

"It's about time you showed up." Luke said smiling at him and arching his brow.

"Talk about late Jace. Geez get a watch or something." Simon scoffed and then everyone cracked up laughing.

"I'm not late. Everyone else is simply early." Jace retorted and then came the hugs and hellos from everyone.

"So Isabelle, when's that baby popping out?" He looked at his sister with a sense of sadness. Clary wanted that. A family.

"I don't know but it better be soon. I can't see my feet any longer."

"What about you Jace?" Simon asked sipping what looked like champagne. "You seeing anyone?" Everyone looked at Jace with questioning eyes, but some had eagerness in them as well. He didn't date after Clary passed it was too hard in the beginning but once he got to college he had a few brief relationships.

"Actually I am. This girl Kaelie. I'm not really sure that it will last though." Jace looked at the glass Jocelyn had handed him just a few seconds before.

"That's because you keep comparing everyone to Clary." It was Alec who said this in a small voice. He didn't want Jace angry with him. Jace knew it was true though. Clary was once in a lifetime and maybe he would never meet a girl that he loved as much as her, or loved at all for that matter. But then again maybe he would. He never shut his mind off to anyone.

"Yeah…I know." Jace stood from the couch and climbed the steps quickly to the upstairs. He felt the sad eyes of his friends and family, but he didn't need their pity or their grief. It was supposed to be a party but so far wasn't much of one. Jace found himself in front of Clarys' room, the door closed. Jace pressed his forehead to the wood and squeezed his eyes shut, putting his hand on the door knob. He wanted to go inside. He hadn't been in the room since _that night_. But he needed this, he needed to feel her presence even after all these years. He opened the door with no hesitation and opened his eyes.

He froze at the sight around him. Clarys' stuff was gone, all except for her sketchbooks and paintings, that is. It looked like just a guest bedroom with a clutter of papers and books. Her paintings were hung up and looked awesome but Jace felt a void. He wanted to see Clarys' clutter to make the pain in his heart lessen. He looked around a moment then went over to the bed, plopping on top of it and sighing.

He glanced to the window for a split second, before hearing a voice. "It's different huh?" It was Isabelle standing in the doorway. Jace turned his head, nodded then looked around again.

"Yeah it is. Really different." Isabelle came into the room, plopping on the space beside Jace. "It's empty. Like she never existed."

"Jace just because her room is-"

"It's not her room I was speaking of." Jace looked to his feet. He didn't understand why this was coming up all of a sudden. Maybe it was because it was his first time in the room since he lost Clary.

"Then what were you talking about?"

"I was talking about the places in my brain where my memories of her are. They've faded extremely, I can barely remember the sound of her laugh, or the way she would lecture me, or her smile. The last one is the hardest to remember. The only thing I can remember is her dying. " Jace looked up when he heard Izzy sniffle a little. "No hormonal girl, please don't cry."

Izzy laughed a little and punched him in the arm. And just as quickly as it appeared the smile from her face became nonexistent. "It will fade. The memories anyway, but the ache will never disappear completely. The tiny feeling of a piece missing will never go away. I wish it did to but it won't."

"I wanted to say thanks by the way. For making me chase Clary."

"I didn't make you chase Clary, you did that on your own accord. You just needed that extra push." Then there was silence between them. That is until Jace spoke.

"I miss her."

"We all do but I'm glad you're home today. Now let's go enjoy the party together." Jace expected Isabelle to stand but instead she just stared.

"You can go Iz. Be there in a minute."

"I would but I need help standing." Jace chuckled and then helped Izzy up and watched her wobble downstairs.

Jace looked around a minute and then gave a little smile. She was watching him, he could feel it. He would always love her no matter what but it was time to move on. Live for her. Live for his family. But more importantly live for himself. Jace turned, went to the doorway, gave one last look then shut the door.

Clary was now literally now his angel.

**THE END! It's over, sad right? BUUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT You can read more of my works by going to my profile. **

**I suggest THE BRIDGE BETWEEN US! (seriously if it doesn't get more reviews then I will delete it) And also my other works! THANKS FOR READIN, REVIEWING, STORY ALERTING, AND FAVORITING!**


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